Whatever It Takes
by mikka18
Summary: AU Buffy gets expelled from boarding school and comes home to find that a lot of things have changed. - Please check it out!
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything from BtVS or AtS - it all belongs to Joss Whedon. _

**Chapter One:**

Buffy Summers looked out of the bus window as the rain drops slid down it slowly. She was desperately trying to drown out the lady who sat beside her, knowing that she didn't have a whole lot of patience left in her body. Her eye lids were drooping and she could feel herself starting to fall asleep when something - someone - starting poking her arm.

Turning, she looked at the older woman. "What do you want lady? I'm not having a very good day, so I'd appreciate it if you could leave me alone."

"Do you want to talk about it honey?"

Buffy rolled her eyes. "No, not really. Thanks."

"Are you sure? Because I hear that its very - "

"Alright, fine. You want to know why I'm having such a bad day? I got expelled from my school for having an affair with my much older teacher... is that all you want to know or would you like to me to get into details?"

Buffy smiled in triumph when the woman stood and moved to another seat. "Now, what was I doing. Right, sleeping..."

She closed her eyes and her mind drifted back to earlier that day.

_Buffy sat in large room, the walls plastered in awards and certificates. Her legs were crossed and her hands placed intertwined on top of them. She was dying to scratch them - the leggings she had on were driving her crazy -_ _but she resisted temptation because she knew it wouldn't look good in front of her headmaster. And, she needed all the help she could get. _

_"So, Ms. Summers... It has been brought to my attention that you and Mr. Finn have been having an intimate relationship, is that correct?" her headmaster asked. He was short, bald and very annoying but he thought highly of himself. _

_"Would you believe me if I said no?" she asked, looking at him innocently._

_"No, I wouldn't. I know your type Ms. Summers, I've dealt with them before and you may think I'm being... unfair? Biased? But I have quite a bit of evidence. I'm not going to name names as far as how I came across it. We'll just say it came from a fellow student, one who was worried about your -"_

_"Ok, you can stop there. I know who it was, and she was not worried about my anything... She blackmailed me into doing a lot of things for her, and... and she gets off with nothing... with more then nothing, she gets praised for it!" Buffy said, angry. _

_"Blackmailed? Do you have any proof of this? Because quite frankly, I think you'll say anything to get yourself out of trouble Ms. Summers. But I'm afraid its too late for that. You've been expelled. I suggest you go to your room, pack your things and call your family because as long as I'm headmaster here, you won't be coming back."_

_The door opened and Buffy turned in her seat to see who had come in. Standing there was a tall man, in his late twentys, with dirty blonde hair and gorgeous brown eyes. Buffy rolled her eyes and turned back to face the headmaster._

_"Ah, Mr. Finn. Take a seat over there, I'll deal with you in a minute."_

_"Look, Mr. Headmaster, I... I just wanted to say that..." she looked to her teacher, and smirked. "I just wanted to say that Mr. Finn is really, really, REALLY good at what he does."_

_"You're dismissed Ms. Summers. You're to be off school property by 3 pm," he said, motioning for Mr. Finn to take her place._

_Buffy stood and walked past Mr. Finn, stopping briefly to look him in the eye. "I'm gonna miss my extra special tutor sessions. But, I have a feeling it won't take you long to find someone else to... tutor."_

_She smiled to herself as she left the office, glad to finally be free of this place._

The bus came to an abrupt halt, causing Buffy's head to fall forward, waking her up. She looked around for a minute, still not really sure of her surroundings. After blinking a few times, she grabbed the bag she had underneath her chair and headed to the front of the bus. Climbing down the steps, her stomach filled with butterflies as her feet touched the pavement. She hadn't been here in two years, she wasn't really sure what she was going to face.

"Home sweet home."

**Ok, so this is just the beginning... Anyway, there's lots of twists in this story so I hope you keep reading but I want honest opinions. I don't write often anymore so I'm kinda rusty. Let me know what you think :) !**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the reviews! **

**Chapter Two:**

Buffy stood on the sidewalk, staring up at the house she had called home for 3 years of her life before her mother sent her away to boarding school. It looked exactly the same, and she smiled at the memories. There were a lot, mostly good but the last year - after her dad left - they started to turn bad. Shaking her head rid of the thoughts, she started to walk towards the door.

She was about to knock when it opened and a young, brown haired girl stood there. She let out a scream and wrapped her arms around Buffy in a tight hug.

Buffy laughed. "Hey Dawnie, nice to see you too."

"It feels like its been forever since you left Buff," she said, taking her sister's hand. "A lot has changed."

"Yeah, including you... aren't you 13? I guess I expected you to be 13 when I came back but -"

"Nope! Definitely not 13 anymore," Dawn said, bringing her sister into the house. "Now, there's someone I want you to..."

As they turned the corner to the living room, Buffy didn't hear her sister talking anymore. She saw him, sitting on the sofa with a grin on his face. He was gorgeous.

"Um, earth to Buffy?" Dawn said, waving a hand in front of her face.

_'Oh My God,' _Buffy thought. _'Way to stare Buff! Now he thinks you're a freak. Ok... maybe you should talk now so he doesn't think there really is something wrong with you.'_

"I... Uh... who's he?" was all she could manage.

"This," Dawn started, walking over and sitting down beside him. "Is Spike. My wonderful boyfriend."

Buffy could feel herself frown on the inside, but she put a big smile on her face for her sister. "Oh, wow. Isn't he... older then you?"

"Buffy!" her mother scolded.

She had been so caught up in Spike, she hadn't even noticed her mother in the room. Or, the man who was standing beside her.

Joyce walked over and put her arms around her daughter, hugging her tightly. "Oh Buffy, its been such a long time. We haven't seen you since Christmas. How was your trip?"

"It was... okay. Who's he?" she asked, looking past her mother.

"His name is Ted. He's... he's my - "

"No... mom, no!" Buffy said, backing away from her. "You... Dad just..."

"Honey, I know. But, you couldn't expect me to live the rest of my life alone, could you? Ted is a nice man and I'm happy with him. I really hoped you'd be okay with this Buffy."

"Okay with it? Mom, you didn't even give me a warning! Why didn't you tell me at Christmas?"

"We've only been together for a couple months, I... I wanted to tell you, but I wasn't sure how," she said, walking towards Buffy.

"A couple months? Are you serious? What else haven't you told me mom? That he lives here too?" she said, sarcastically but when Joyce didn't reply, she shook her head. "No way... I can't believe this."

"Um, Buff? I can help you up to your room, get you settled back in and then - once we're all cooled off here - we can talk over supper, okay?" Dawn asked, walking over to her sister.

She took her gently by the arm and guided her up the stairs, away from the living room. Once upstairs, Buffy followed Dawn into her old room, realizing that it hadn't been touched since she left. With a sigh of relief, she fell onto the bed, looking up at the ceiling. She thought her mom might have turned her room into an office or some type of storage for the gallery that she worked at.

"So, that didn't go as smooth as I thought," Dawn said, sitting beside her on the bed.

"I can't... I cant believe that mom has a new boyfriend and she never even told me! And he lives here? That's just... weird."

"Yeah, it is kinda weird. But, I haven't even really noticed him since Spike moved in."

Buffy sat up and looked at her sister with a blank expression. "Spike... lives... here."

"Yeah... his parents moved back to England and they wanted him to finish his schooling here."

"Oh... so, he shares a room with you?"

Dawn laughed and hit her in the arm playfully. "No silly. You actually think mom would let me sleep in the same bed as Spike? He sleeps in the basement."

"Oh, that must be nice for him. All dark and dank."

"Yeah well, he's had worse I guess. So, enough about us, how was school? Mom told me you got expelled for getting a little cozy with one of the teachers... is that true? Give me some details," she said, smiling.

"Yes, it is true but you definitely do not get any details. I'm trying to forget the whole experience myself."

"Aw c'mon, you're not gonna give me anything?" Dawn asked and Buffy shook her head. "And I was hoping to get some tips from you..."

Dawn couldn't help but laugh when Buffy's jaw dropped. "I'm just joking Buff, jeez! I'm not a slut."

"Could of fooled me," Buffy said, smiling.

Dawn was about to speak when they heard their mother yelling up to them. "Girls! Dinner is ready!"

"Wow, that was quick," Buffy said. "Do I have to go down there? I mean... can't you just bring it up to me? Or I can skip supper, I had a really big lunch."

Dawn stood and grabbed her sister's hand, pulling her up off the bed. "If I have to endure this, you do too. It won't be that bad, I promise. I'm on your side."

Buffy crinkled her face and pouted. "Fine, you win. But you so owe me for this."

---

The two girls walked into the dining room, hand in hand. Buffy gave her nicest fake smile possible and sat down on the side opposite Spike and Dawn. She looked up at him and he sent her a wink that made her smile for real. She knew it was wrong, but she couldn't help it. He was definitely her type and the only reason she hadn't jumped him already, was her sister. She could never hurt Dawn like that.

"Buffy, nice of you to join us," Ted said from the end of the table.

Buffy just nodded her head and looked down at her plate of food. She wasn't very hungry, she'd lost her appetitie once she realized things really weren't how she thought they'd be. She wasn't sure exactly what she expected to come home to, but she didn't think - or at least hoped - her mother wouldn't have moved on so quick. Sure, it had been 2 years since her dad left, but Buffy left so soon after, she hadn't really been able to adjust to her mom on her own, or with someone else.

"I was planning on sending you into school with Dawn and Spike in the morning so you can enroll again. If you need to wait a little bit longer, that's fine. I just thought you might want to jump back in before you miss too much," Joyce said, breaking the awkward silence.

Buffy simply nodded again with a shrug. "Yeah, okay."

"You're gonna be a senior right, Buffy? I won't be in any of your classes, but Spike should be, he's a senior too," Dawn said, smiling.

"Okay, thanks. But, I should remember... and, hopefully I still have some friends left," Buffy smiled at her sister, then looked to Spike. "You don't say much do you?"

"When I feel like it," he said, shoving a spoonful of food into his mouth.

Buffy looked down at her food, then back to her mother. "Can I be excused? I guess I'm not hungry from the bus ride over... I'm just really tired."

Joyce nodded. "Of course honey."

Buffy stood up and headed upstairs.

---

Knock. Knock.

Buffy was in the middle of putting her jacket on when the door opened and Dawn walked in.

She looked confused. "Where are you going? I thought you were tired."

"Lie," Buffy said, looking up at her sister as she stumbled trying to quickly put on her black leather boots.

"Oh... well, at least let me come with you. Spike could come to, he can drive you know?"

Buffy nodded. "Thanks Dawn, but I've got a few things I need to do on my own."

"Oh... okay."

Buffy walked over to her and looked at her with a soft expression. "I'm sorry to be rushing out on you, I know you probably wanted to spend some time together. But I promise tomorrow night we'll rent a bunch of movies and buy tons of junk food... okay?"

Dawn smiled. "Yeah, alright. But I'm gonna hold you to it."

After a quick hug, Buffy started to walk over to her bedroom window.

"Hey Buffy? Why don't you try the front door? I don't want to be watching moves and eating junk food in the hospital."

Buffy laughed. "Fine. Cover me?"

---

**Its kinda starting off slowly but it'll pick up. Review please !**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**

Buffy wrapped her arms tight around her body as she walked down the street. She was headed towards the local teenage hangout, the Bronze. At least it was all the rage when she was here before, but she figured since Sunnydale wasn't that big of a place, it probably still was.

"Buffy?!"

She heard her name being called from behind her and stopped, turning around to see who it was. She smiled when she saw a tall, dark haired guy running towards her.

"Angel," she whispered to herself.

Angel was her boyfriend before she left for school. They hadn't really talked about ending the relationship, but they both knew that it wouldn't work long distance. He wasn't the best influence - she would admit that - but she had fallen for him the minute she laid eyes on him. Even though it had been 2 years since they seen each other, all of the old feelings were coming back to her.

She smiled at him when he finally approached her.

"Buffy," he said, looking down into her eyes. "I missed you."

"I missed you too Angel," she said, reaching up to hug him. She pulled back slightly and they just gazed at each other before he brought his lips down to hers in a soft kiss.

"Hey, Angel!"

Buffy cursed whoever interrupted them. Angel pulled away from her, still with his arm around her waist.

"Angel, who's the... Buffy?" Oh my God Buffy!"

Buffy laughed as her friend, Cordelia ran into her arms, squeezing her tight.

"Cordy, nice to see you haven't changed," Buffy said, smiling.

"I can't believe you're back! I was getting so tired of having to talk to Harmony about my all personal business. You know how she can't hold a secret," Cordelia said. "But enough of that... how long are you staying for this time?"

"You're stuck with me guys. I, uh... I got expelled," Buffy said.

"What? What for?" Angel asked.

Buffy looked to the ground and scuffed her feet on the ground. "Um... just..."

"Just being Buffy, huh? If I remember right, you aren't very good at following rules," Cordelia butted in.

Buffy laughed. "Yeah, something like that."

She could feel Angel's hold on her tighten and she looked up at him. His eyes were focused on something - really focused - and he looked as if he was going to explode.

"Angel? You... okay?" Buffy asked.

He looked down at her, then back to where he was looking before. "I'm fine."

Cordelia turned to see who was behind her that Angel was so upset about and saw just who she expected. "Oh my God... what are they doing there?"

Buffy was confused and looked in the same direction. She saw Spike, and two other people that she didn't recognize, headed towards the Bronze entrance. She wasn't sure what was so upseting about them, Spike seemed like an okay guy - not to mention, drool worthy.

"Um... something wrong?" Buffy asked.

"Yes. We're your friends Buff, so I'm going to give you a heads up. Don't - and I mean do not - ever socialize with those freaks. They will ruin your reputation - our reputation," Cordelia said, with a hint of disgust in her voice.

Buffy didn't say anything. She was busy racking her brain, trying to remember if her friends were always this ridiculous or if it had just started once she left.

"Why don't we go inside now? Its getting cold and I'm dying of thirst," Buffy said, releasing herself from Angel's hold.

She wasn't sure if she should take his hand, grab his arm or just walk alongside him. They had a complicated relationship. One that lacked communciation but had somehow managed to work. They didn't talk about their feelings, they showed them and there was always an unspoken understanding where they just knew how the other felt.

Even if he was an ass sometimes, she'd always love him.

Once they were inside, Buffy headed straight for the food and drink area. The place was exactly the same as she remembered it, just freshly painted with a few new furniture pieces. She could feel Angel beside her as she stopped at the counter and looked over at him.

"Do you want anything?" she asked. He just shook his head. "Alright, its just me then."

She ordered her drink and turned back to Angel who had his eyes glued on her. She smiled at him. "What?"

"You're beautiful Buff," he said, wrapping his arms around her waist. "Its been so long since I've held you."

She relaxed in his grip and felt completely comfortable. "I know... do you want to dance?" she asked, looking up at him sweetly. She knew he wasn't a big fan of dancing, but he always did it for her.

"I will, but you have to do something for me, too."

"Really? And what would that be?"

He leaned down and whispered into her ear, "I want a kiss."

"A kiss?" she asked, pulling away from him slightly. "I can give you more then that."

---

Buffy had just finished in the bathroom at the Bronze and was headed to go back to where Angel was sitting when she saw Spike sitting over in the corner, alone. She hesitated for a minute before she found herself walking over towards him.

"Hi," she said, hoping he had heard her.

He looked up at her. "'Ello luv."

"Um... I saw you come in with some friends, so I won't talk long but I just thought I'd pop over and say hi," she said. _Oh my gosh Buffy, how lame are you? Wait... why are you nervous? Why do you care? You're with Angel... well, sort of with Angel. _

He smirked at her and waited a second before talking. "You need a ride home pet?"

_What's with the nicknames? Luv, pet? What the heck is that? _she thought.

"Um, actually... yeah, that'd be great. When are you leaving?"

"'Bout ten minues."

"Ten minutes? Okay... I'll meet you outside the front then," she said, waving at him before quickly heading back to her spot with Angel.

She shook off the feeling Spike had left on her and sat down on Angel's lap, wrapping her hands around his neck and resting her head on his shoulder. Spike might drive her a little crazy on the inside, but she didn't even know him - she cared about Angel.

"I had fun tonight," she said.

"Me too."

"And I'm sorry to call it in early but if I'm gonna get a drive home, I need to leave in ten," she said, looking up at him. "But I'll see you tomorrow, bright and early at school. You can help me refresh my memory."

"You mean like the janitor's closet?" he asked, smiling at her.

She laughed. "I don't think I could ever forget where that is."

She leaned down and kissed him before standing up. Angel stood and held her jacket for her while she put it on.

"Thanks," she said, smiling up at him. She grabbed his wrist and glanced down at the watch, noticing she still had a few minutes before she was supposed to meet Spike. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

He nodded and with one more quick kiss she disappeared.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four:**

The drive home with Spike was quiet and slightly awkward. Buffy just kept her gaze out the window because she knew if she didn't, her eyes would avert to Spike's nicely shaped body. And that would be bad.

When they pulled into the driveway of the Summers house, Buffy looked over to Spike and sent him a smile of thanks before opening the door and getting out. She saw him get out after her but he stayed behind, lighting up a cigarette.

She opened the door to the house and stepped inside. She glanced around and quietly begun to sneak up the steps when she heard her mother's voice coming from the dining room.

"Buffy Anne Summers," she said, appearing behind her.

Buffy turned around slowly. "Mom, I can explain."

Joyce crossed her arms. "I'm listening."

Buffy thought for a minute. She couldn't bring Angel into this - her mother hated him with a passion - as well as her other friends. "I... uh... Spike! He was giving me a little tour around town, so that I wouldn't get lost tomorrow and any other future trips outside of the house."

Joyce sighed. "Alright, I'm going to let you off on this one Buffy but only because you just got here. I'd be really disappointed if you went back to your old ways, you've come so far."

Buffy just nodded and hurried up the stairs to her room.

---

It was late - around midnight - when Buffy managed to get up enough energy to head downstairs. She had been having some trouble sleeping, and guessed it was the change. She slipped into the kitchen and opened the cupboard, grabbing a package of chocolate chip cookies. She placed them on the counter and continued to the fridge where she pulled out a carton of milk. She was in the middle of pouring herself a glass when the back door opened and Spike walked in.

"Are you just getting in now?" she asked, sitting down at the island.

He hung his duster up on the rack and sat down beside her, stealing a cookie. "Yeah, I am."

"So... where'd you go?"

He looked at her and raised an eyebrow. "Nosey little thing, aren't we?"

"I..."

"Was out for a walk. Only time I get to myself," he said, stopping her. "I saw you tonight."

She looked confused. "Yeah, I know... we did have a little conversation."

"No, I mean, I saw you tonight with Peaches."

"Ok now you've just lost me. Peaches? What's with you and nicknames?" she asked.

"Peaches... Angel. And, I'm British luv, we like nicknames."

"Angel? Where the heck did you get Peaches from - " He cut her off with a look. "Why do you care if I was with Angel?"

"I don't. I just didn't think you were friends with the likes of him. You don't seem his type."

"And what kind of 'type' is that?"

Spike shook his head. "Nothing. Forget I said anything."

"Fine," she said, taking a bite out of a cookie. "So, when you finish school are you going back to England?"

Spike shrugged. "Don't know. Why the interest?"

"Because I care about Dawn, that's why. I don't want her to get all upset and mopey."

He smiled. "I care about your sister, pet. I wouldn't hurt her if that's what you're getting at."

"You better not or I'll do some serious butt kicking." He laughed. "Hey! I can fight... I'm not like Cordelia, okay?"

"Whatever you say luv," he said, standing. "I'm off."

"I don't know how you can sleep down there," she said, taking a sip of her milk. "Its all... ick."

"I've fixed it up some, 's not so bad anymore. You can come down and see it sometime if you like," he said, opening the door to the basement.

She laughed. "Yeah, I don't think I'll be taking you up on that offer anytime soon. Night," she said as he disappeared.

_Or maybe I will..._

_  
_---

Buffy had just finished up in the principals office at Sunnydale High School. She was all set for her classes and - even though she'd never admit it - she was pretty excited to start.

"Hm... what first?" she said to herself as she walked out into the hallway filled with students. She looked down at her schedule and saw that she had a relatively easy class first - gym. _Ok, this should be a sinch. I wonder if Angel or Cordy is in the same class as me..._

"Hey Buff, you all done?" Dawn asked, walking up to her. Spike was close behind, along with the two people she had seen him with the other night.

"Are you going to introduce us Dawn?" the guy behind Spike asked.

"Right, my bad. Buffy, this is Xander and Willow. Guys, this is Buffy... but, you should know each other, right? You all went to the same school two years ago."

Buffy tried hard to remember, but she couldn't. "Sorry, drawing a blank here," she said, but smiled. "Its nice to meet you though."

The bell rang and Dawn moved closer to Buffy, glancing at her schedule. "Hey Spike? You have gym first period today, don't you?" He nodded. "Meet your new gym buddy. I'll catch up with you at lunch babe," she said to Spike, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek before walking off with Xander and Willow, leaving the two alone.

_Awkward,_ Buffy thought. _I'm probably going to get on Cordelia's bad side if she sees me hanging out with Spike and Dawn, but... who cares? _

"You ready?" he asked, looking over at her.

She nodded and they headed towards the gym.

---

"So, how do you guys like Buffy?" Dawn asked, looking over at her friends, Willow and Xander.

They were eating lunch in the school library, like they did every day.

"She seems different," Willow said. "I mean, since before she left. She's changed."

"I know," Dawn said. "But that's a good thing... the old Buffy wasn't so nice."

"You can say that again," Xander said, flipping a page in on of the many books scattered across the table. "Remind me... what are we looking for again?"

"Anything that will give us information on the strange occurances lately," Giles, the librarian said as he walked out of his office. "The rise in demonic activity is astonishing... and frightening."

The group of friends had all banned together when someone they cared about had been kidnapped. That's when they met Giles, who was looking deeper into the disappearance of their friend, only to realize that he was beyond help - he was a vampire.

Giles was a Watcher, sent over from England to train and watch over the newest Vampire Slayer. Only, he had yet to find her. The Council hadn't given him much information, they just simply stated "she will show herself to you when the time is right". Which, left the friends and Watcher to keep the demon population under control - not an easy task.

"Why can't the Council just tell us the Slayer's name already so we can get some much needed help?" Dawn asked. "We're losing the fight here Giles... I'm not one to give up but honestly, we're just a bunch of pathetic humans with no real super powers or - "

She was interrupted when the door opened, and when they realized it was only Spike, they continued the conversation.

"What I'm saying is... we need her... now. Before things get worse."

"I wish it was that simple," Giles said.

"We talking 'bout the Slayer again?" Spike asked.

Dawn nodded. "How do we even know she's not here already? What if she's hiding? What if she knows and doesn't want to tell anyone because she doesn't want to be involved in this stuff?"

Willow spoke up. "We just have to keep doing what we're doing and wait... she'll come."


	5. Chapter 5

_Thanks for the reviews :) I don't want to say anything but it'll all be explained in the next chapter or so._

_Keep 'em coming! _

**Chapter Five:**

"Thanks for the drive Angel," Buffy said, leaning over to give him a quick kiss on the cheek before getting out of the car.

She waved to him as he drove off before turning around and heading up to the house. She walked in and was on her way up to her room when Ted walked in front of her. Confused, she tried to get past him, but he didn't move.

"Excuse me?" she said, crossing her arms.

"Didn't your mother ask you to stay away from that young man?"

"What? Were you spying on me?" she asked, her anger level rising. _God, does he work? _

"You're avoiding the question."

Buffy sighed and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, she did. But, if you haven't checked the mirror lately, you aren't her."

She could tell her comment sent something off inside of him, and he reached over, grabbing onto her wrist tightly.

She looked up at him. "Let go of me - "

The door opened and Ted quickly dropped his grip on her arm. Spike and Dawn walked into the house, in the middle of a conversation, when they realized Buffy and Ted standing there. Buffy was rubbing her wrist with a look on her face that let Dawn know something wasn't right.

"What's wrong with your arm Buff?" she asked.

"Nothing, just a little sore from gym today, I guess," Buffy said. "I'll be in my room."

Dawn watched as her sister hurried up the steps and she turned to Spike. "I'm going to go see if she's alright..."

He nodded and she smiled at him before she headed up to Buffy's room.

---

Buffy had been laying in her bed, staring up at the ceiling for what seemed like hours. After assuring Dawn that she was fine, and nothing happened with Ted, she'd decided to turn in early after talking to Angel on the phone for an hour. She was afraid her mother was going to force her downstairs for supper, but she was working at the gallery late and hadn't bothered Buffy yet.

For some reason, she felt her thoughts drifting to Spike. She couldn't get his image out of her head, and she wasn't sure if she wanted to. She was happy with Angel, she really was, but there was just something about Spike she couldn't shake.

She could hear a door open downstairs and found herself quickly getting out of bed and heading down to see who it was.

"Mom?" she asked, turning the corner to the kitchen. "Mom, are you - " She stopped when she saw Spike pouring a glass of water. "Oh, its you."

"Expectin' someone else, luv?" he asked, sitting down at the island.

"Yeah, I... I thought you were my mom."

"Sorry to disappoint."

She shrugged and headed over to the refridgerator. "As long as I'm down here, I might as well get something yummy for my tummy."

He just sent her a look and turned back to his water. There was a silence between them while she dug around the cupboards, looking for something to eat. It wasn't awkward this time though, it was more comfortable.

"Do you want some?" she asked, sticking a bowl of ice cream in front of him.

"'s that all you eat? Junk?"

She thought for a minute. "Yeah, pretty much."

"Don't know how you keep a hot little body like that, then," he said to himself, not knowing he said it loud enough for her to hear.

She could feel herself blush and reached up to get a glass. She turned to get into the fridge and still a little baffled by his comment, her arm knocked the glass onto the floor.

"Oh great," she mumbled, kneeling down to gather the pieces. "Can you get me the broom Spike?"

"Sure pet," he said, and disappeared.

Buffy collected all the larger pieces of glass and was putting them into the garbage when she felt one cut her finger.

"Oww," she whined as she walked over to the sink and turned it on. The cut wasn't serious but it was deep enough to draw a fair amount of blood. "Smooth one Buff."

"You okay?" Spike asked, appearing beside her with a broom.

"Yeah, I just nicked my finger on a piece of glass... I'll survive."

Spike rested the broom on the wall, reached into a nearby drawer and pulled out a bandaid. He extended his hand for her, and she hesitated a minute before letting him take her finger. He placed it gently over her cut and brought it up to his lips, kissing it. Buffy looked up at him and was lost in his eyes for a moment.

He dropped her hand quickly and passed her the broom.

"Sorry," he said, putting his glass in the sink. "Don't know why I did that."

"Its okay," she said. "No harm done."

"Right," he said, heading for the basement. "Night then."

"Goodnight," she said and watched as he disappeared before she finished cleaning up.

---

The next morning, Buffy woke up to her phone ringing. With a groan, she rolled over and picked it up.

"Hello?"

'Buffy, did I wake you?'

"Angel? A little bit, but I have to get up anyway. Its much nicer to wake up to your voice then my annoying alarm clock."

'Do you need a ride to school this morning? I can come by and pick you up on my way.'

"Yeah, alright. That'd be great."

'Okay, I'll see you in an hour then?'

"Yep, sounds good."

'I love you.'

She smiled. "I love you too Angel."

The line went dead and Buffy hung up the phone before falling back onto her pillow.

"Ughh.."

An hour later, Buffy was ready and she headed downstairs. She could hear Joyce and Ted in the kitchen, laughing, but choose not to stop in and say goodbye. She opened the front door and saw Angel parked at the end of the driveway. She looked back at the house one last time and noticed someone in the window.

_Oh my God, are you serious? What is his deal? _she thought, rolling her eyes.

She jumped in the car, leaned over and gave Angel a kiss, hoping that he had saw.

Unknown to her, Ted wasn't the only one watching.

---

Buffy walked out of the locker room and into the gym. She saw Spike standing over in the corner, still wearing his black jeans and t-shirt. She hesitated for a second before heading over towards him.

"Hey," she said. "Aren't you going to change for class?" He looked down to the floor. "Spike? Are you mad or something? Look, about last night... its fine. I know it was a mistake, you probably are just used to Dawn and - "

"I'm not mad, luv," he said, straightening up.

"Okay... then, is something wrong? Did you and Dawn have a fight? You seem kind of... depressed. More then usual," she added with a smile, hoping for a reaction from him but none came.

She was about to say something else when the teacher spoke up. "Ok class, today we're going to be practising some basketball. You're going to broke up into four teams and..."

Buffy looked over at Spike, who was staring over at the teacher, as if he was actually interested in what he was saying. She couldn't figure him out. Was he... jealous? She had some experience with jealousy. Angel wasn't exactly thrilled when Buffy would talk to - or even look at - another guy. It almost seemed as if Spike was mad at her for something similar. Then, it came to her. _He saw me,_ she thought. _He saw me kiss Angel today... but, why would that make Spike jealous? He doesn't like me like that..._

"Buffy?" Spike said, catching her attention.

"What?"

"Catch," he said, tossing a basketball in her direction.


	6. Chapter 6

_Thanks for the reviews :) _

**Chapter Six:**

Buffy sat on the bed in her room, her school books spread out in front of her. She had been working on homework since she got home, trying to keep herself occupied. Angel had offered her a drive, but she had refused after being lectured by Cordelia again about who to hang out with, she really wasn't in the mood for anyone.

Spike had ignored her for pretty much the whole day, only talking to her when she asked him a question he felt like answering. She was so confused by him, she couldn't understand for the life of her why he would be jealous of her and Angel. He had Dawn, and he had told her that he cared for her.

_Yeah but he never said he was in love with her,_ Buffy thought to herself. _Then who's he in love with Buff? You? Right, maybe in your dreams... wait, what? No... No, I don't like Spike like that, jeez..._

She was interrupted when her bedroom door opened and her mother walked in.

"Hey mom, what's up?" Buffy asked, as she sat down beside her. "Something wrong?"

"No, I just think we need to talk honey. You've been kind of distant lately, which is understandable. This is a lot to take in, but Ted was telling me about what happened."

"He was?" she asked, suprised. "Mom, I - "

"Buffy, I know it's hard to break away from something that you're so used to... so familiar with. But, Angel and his friends... you can do better. Ted explained to me about what happened, that you got sassy with him, and - "

"Mom," she said, cutting her off. "I was only "sassy" with him because he was spying on me! That's invading my privacy... not to mention, other things... we just... we don't get along."

Joyce nodded and took her daughter's hand. "Which is why we've made plans to spend some time together as a family this weekend, so we can all get close again. I've really missed not having you home Buffy, and I really hope that you can put your attitude aside and try to be nice with Ted."

_MY attitude? _she thought. "That sounds nice mom, really... but, I already have plans this weekend and I don't know if I can get out of them. Sorry."

Joyce shook her head. "Then you're just going to have to cancel them. There's no way you're getting out of this Buffy, we need this."

She sighed. "Whatever... I'll try to put my attitude and bad behaviour on the back burner for the weekend," she said, sarcastically. "But I'm not making any promises that me and Ted are going to form a lasting friendship."

Joyce nodded and stood up. "Good enough. I have to get back to the gallery now, I won't be home until late, will you be alright?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I think I'm going to head out in a minute, go for a walk, clear my head."

"Okay, but don't stay out too late honey."

"I won't mom," Buffy said, and watched her leave.

---

Buffy walked down the dim lit street. She was headed to Angel's house to surprise him. She had been a littke grumpy with him earlier, and she felt bad for it so she wanted to make it up to him. In a way, she felt guilty too. Guilty that lately, Angel wasn't the only guy who was on her mind. She was loyal to him, she'd never cheat on him, but the fact that the thought had crossed her mind, scared her.

She stopped when she came to the end of his driveway. Taking a deep breath, she headed up towards his house. She knocked on the door, and it opened revealing his mother.

"Oh, hi," Buffy said, bringing her hand up slightly to wave.

"Hello Buffy, it's nice to see you again. Angel's upstairs in his room, he's got a friend up there too, I believe," she said, stepping aside to let Buffy in.

"Okay, thanks," she said before quickly heading up the steps.

She turned the hallway and stopped in front of Angel's bedroom door. She wondered if she should knock first, but opted not to, it'd make a better surprise if she didn't.

Opening the door, her smile faded from her face at what she saw. Instead of giving Angel a surprise, he gave her one. He was there with a friend alright - Cordelia. And, they were looking a little bit more then just friendly. He was on top of Cordelia, kissing her passionately. Buffy had always had her suspicions about them in the past, but she thought Angel loved her. She never, ever, expected this from him.

"Oh my God," she said, clamping a hand over her mouth.

The two looked up, just now realizing they had company.

"Angel? How... why?" she asked, near tears. "I thought we..." He quickly climbed off the bed and walked over to her, reaching out to take her hands. She pulled back. "No... no, don't you dare touch me. Not after..."

She went to leave, but he grabbed her arm, pulling her back to face him. "Buffy, it was only this once... it was a mistake, I didn't plan it."

"But obviously you didn't stop it, did you? One time is all it takes Angel, how can I trust you? How do I know that it's only been once?" she looked down to her arm and back up at him. "Let me go."

"No," he said. "Not until you let me explain."

"Explain? What is there to explain? You've been sleeping with Cordelia behind my back! I don't want the details!" she said, and she could feel the tears coming down her cheeks. "Let. Me. Go."

"Buffy..."

When he loosened his grip on her, she pulled her arm away from him and left without another word.

---

After seeing Angel with Cordelia, Buffy couldn't go home. She knew she'd go insane just sitting in the house, thinking of them. No, she had to get out and the only place she could think of was here - the cemetery. Dark and quiet. Probably not the safest place for a girl to go alone at night, but this was Sunnydale, what happens here?

_AH! I just wish I could hurt something right now... how could he do that to me? How could he cheat on me with... with Cordelia, of all people! _Buffy thought, wrapping her arms tight around her torso. _Maybe I should head home, it's getting late... and cold._

On her way out of the cemtery, a weird feeling came over her, and she heard a noise behind her. Stopping, she paused for a minute, trying to figure out what it was.

"Hello? Is someone there?" she asked, looking around. _Nope, just you being crazy._

"Isn't it past your bedtime little girl?"

It was a deep voice, coming from behind her. Turning, she felt her jaw drop and she began to stumble backwards. A man stood before her, but there was something wrong with his face - like a... vampire.

"What... what are you? Your face is..."

"Handsome? I know."

"I was going more for ugly, but..."

"Do you really think it's the appropriate time for jokes girl? You do know what I am, right? A vampire... and you know what vampires like?"

Buffy laughed nervously. "So this is the part where I run, yeah?"

He shrugged. "It's more fun that way."

With a loud scream, Buffy bolted in the opposite direction, running as fast she she could - which was surprisingly fast. For some reason, she could sense the vampire close to her, but she didn't dare look back. Even though she was running fast, she doubted she would be able to out run him, so she quickly ducked behind one of the nearby trees, hoping to throw him off.

Staying quiet and absolutely still, Buffy held her body as close to the tree as she possibly could. She could hear his footsteps slow down, and her heart was beating so fast, she was surprised he couldn't hear it. Then, out of nowhere she felt a cold hand on her mouth and she felt herself come flying from the tree, hitting the ground hard. She went to stand up, but felt the weight of a body on top of her and looked up to see the vampire staring down into her eyes.

"Hold still... it will only hurt for a minute," he said, bringing his open mouth down to her neck.

She could feel his fangs pierce her skin and she let out another loud scream. But as soon as he started to drink from her, he was pulled off, sent to the ground a few feet away from Buffy.

Scrambling back against a tree, she brought her hand up to her neck and touched her wound. She brought her hand down to her eye level and saw the blood - her blood.

She looked over to where the vampire had fell and saw an older man drive a stake into his heart, turning him into nothing but dust. He started to walk over towards Buffy, when four other people came running up behind him. They were too far away, and it was too dark for her to tell who they were until they got closer.

"D-Dawn? Spike, Willow... Xander?" Buffy asked. "What... what?"

Dawn squatted down beside her sister. "Are you okay Buffy? Did he bite you?"

"How do you know about... what's going on?"

"We should get you home, and then we'll explain everything," Dawn said, offering her sister her hand.

Buffy shook her head. "No. I'm not leaving here until I know what the hell is going on. Vampires... they aren't real."

"Yeah, I'm afraid they are," Dawn looked back to her friends. "And, we think you're the... The Vampire Slayer."

Buffy looked shocked. "Okay, what?! Obviously you're wrong... if I'm the Slayer, how come I let that vampire hurt me? I'd be super strong and I'd have - "

"He tasted your blood," the older man, Giles, spoke up. "Before I staked him, if I'm correct, he whispered "Slayer". The power that runs through the Slayer's blood is something you can't mistake."

"Who are you? I don't even - "

"I'm your Watcher," he said.

"We can talk about this later," Dawn said, walking over to Spike. "We really should get her back to the house. She hasn't lost much blood, but she's going to need to be patched up."

Spike nodded and walked over to where Buffy still sat. "C'mon luv, let me help you up."

Buffy hesitated, but she accpeted his offer and manged to stand on her feet.

"Can you walk?" Spike asked, looking her over.

"Of course I can walk," Buffy said, but quickly rested her hand on the tree for support. "... I think."

"Here, put all your weight on me pet," he said, wrapping her arm around his neck and supporting her with his arm around her waist. "Now, lets get you home."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven:**

Dawn closed the door to Buffy's room and headed down the stairs to the living room. Buffy was in bed, resting and trying to absorb everything that had just happened.

"How is she?" Giles asked when Dawn came into the room.

"As good as can be expected, I guess... She's freaked," she said, sitting down beside Spike on the sofa. "I just can't believe it's Buffy..."

"Do we know this for sure? Maybe I'm the only one, but going on something a vampire said, well it's a little sketchy," Xander said. "They aren't exaclty known to be trustworthy."

"Xander's right," Giles said. "We'll have to test her."

"Test me?" 

They all looked up to see Buffy standing in the doorway. 

"That's the only way we can know for sure if you are the Slayer," Giles said. 

Buffy laughed. "What do you want me to do? Kill something? I'm too young... I can't be a Slayer."

"Actually, you're quite old. Slayers are usually called at fifteen or sixteen," Giles said.

"Old? Look who's talking," Buffy said. "Can't you just... find another girl? I mean, there's got to be more then one, right?"

"There is only one Slayer at a time, called when the one before her dies. There is no way to reverse it or change it."

"Well... what if I say no?"

Giles looked down at the ground, then back up at her. "You won't be prepared and... and you'll most likely die quite soon."

Buffy felt a lump forming in her throat, but ignored him. "So, what are you guys then? You've been fighting the vampires, can't you just take over?"

"It's not that simple. We don't have the strength, the - "

"Neither do I! I can barely lift a chair," she said. 

"I suppose it's possible you aren't," Giles said. "But we should act as if you are, test you, see if you - "

"No," Buffy said. "I won't. This is crazy."

"Buffy, we need you," Dawn said, standing up. She walked over to her sister. "I know this is rough for you, it's a lot to take in. But we're... We're losing here. I don't know how much longer we can keep them back... the numbers are growing and they're getting stronger... we're not destined to do this. You are."

"Dawnie... I - "

"You know why we do it?" Dawn asked. "A few months ago, our friend was... taken. That's when Giles showed up. You have a choice, Buff. You can ignore it, pretend like you aren't the Slayer and go on with your life as a normal teenager... but not only will they come after you, they'll come after us... and the whole town... the world. If you accept it, and fight, you can stop them... you can. Slayers... in the past, they've been alone, except for their Watcher... but, that's where you're different. You have us, we'll help you, you won't be alone."

"I..." Buffy started, looking from Dawn to the rest of them. As much as she wanted to scream at them and tell them they were insane - she felt inside that they were right... she needed to do this. "I'll try."

---

_Im sorry, its short. But I just wanted to put something up to see if anyone wants me to continue w/ it. Let me know! _


	8. Chapter 8

_Thanks for the review hun :)_

**Chapter Eight:**

"So, what's the what?" Buffy asked, as she sat down in a chair at the school library. "Am I the Slayer or not?"

Giles and the rest of her friends had spent the next lunch hour "testing" Buffy in all sorts of ways - weapons, strength, speed, natural instinct. She had done overly well, suprising herself but not them. They had faith from the beginning that she was the chosen one, but only now was she actually starting to accept it. Even though she still wondered if she had gone crazy, somehow she felt like she finally belonged. 

Giles looked to her. "You are most definitely the Slayer, Buffy." 

Buffy nodded slowly and turned her gaze to the ground. She had been expecting him to say that, but it was different actually hearing it. "Okay... so, what now?" 

"You... You're not going to protest? Tell us we're insane and should be committed?" Dawn asked, walking over to her sister. 

Buffy smiled a little. "No Dawnie. I... I can't fight fate, now can I?"

Dawn wrapped her arms around Buffy tightly. "I love you Buff."

"I love you too."

Buffy could feel another body around hers and pulled away from her sister to see Xander standing behind her. 

"What? I felt left out," he said. 

Buffy just smiled and shook her head. "So Giles, when I can start kicking some vampire butt?"

---

The door to the Summers house opened and Buffy, Spike and Dawn walked in, lost in conversation. They had just got home from a late night training session with Giles and shockingly, Buffy felt happy. Especially considering everything that had happened in the past two days - finding her boyfriend in bed with her "best friend", being biten by a vampire, and becoming a Slayer. She should be traumatized for the rest of her life, but instead, she was happy. 

"I'm going to run up and jump in the shower," Dawn said, stopping at the stairs. 

"I'm headed to the kitchen for some after slaying munchies," Buffy said. "I'll see you tomorrow? We have that extremely fun filled weekend to enjoy."

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Oh, right. I forgot about that. Thank goodness Spike's coming, he can save us from all that boredom."

Buffy smiled. "I'm sure with mom's planning, we'll be anything but bored. More like... annoyed."

Dawn laughed. "I'll see you in the morning guys. Don't stay up too late, k?"

Buffy nodded and watched as her sister gave Spike a quick kiss before running up the stairs. 

She turned toward him before heading into the kitchen. "So, this is where you come from every night. Interesting."

"Usually I do the last sweep by myself. I like it that way."

"But, you could get hurt. I mean, you don't have near the strength that I do, you know?" She said, smiling. "If you ever need someone to protect you..."

"Hey now," he said. "Don't go getting all cocky luv, I could show you a thing or two."

Buffy laughed and was about to say something back when Ted walked in. 

He looked over at Spike. "Could you excuse us? I need to speak with Buffy."

"I - " Spike started, but Buffy cut him off.

"Its okay Spike, I'll see you tomorrow," she said, sending him a smile. 

He nodded and opened the door to the basement, disappearing down the stairs. 

"So, what's up?" Buffy asked, looking over Ted. _He's not so tough looking now, huh Buffy? Now that you're the Slayer, you could totally take his butt._

"I want you to know your mother has spent a great deal planning this weekend for us," he said, walking closer to her. "You better not fuck it up."

Buffy backed up a few steps. "Excuse you?" 

"I think you heard me Buffy."

"You know what I think? You better watch your mouth and your step," she said, holding his gaze.

He laughed. "I know what type of girl you are Buffy, and so does your mother. If anything just accidentally happens... who do you think she'll believe?"

"Do I care?" 

"That's your problem, you don't. I'm just warning you to let this weekend go smoothly."

Buffy laughed. "The only way it would go smoothly, is if you weren't there."

It happened so quick, it took Buffy a minute to proccess. Ted had brought his hand up and slapped her - hard. 

"You just made the biggest mistake of - " Buffy was cut off by the back door opening. She turned around to see Joyce walk in. 

"Hi honey," she said to Buffy as she placed her work bag on the island. "Is something wrong? You look frazzled."

Buffy shook her head. "No, I'm just tired. I'm going to head up to bed, okay?"

Joyce nodded and smiled. "We have a big day tomorrow, you better get your rest."

Buffy put on a fake smile for her mother and headed towards the stairs. 

_You are so lucky._

---

Buffy opened her bedroom door and stepped out into the hallway. She was still in her pyjamas, her hair was a mess, and she had no make-up on but she didn't care, she was hungry and had an extreme craving for some cinnamon toast. 

Turning into the kitchen, she saw Spike sitting by the island, sipping on a cup of coffee. She walked past him and grabbed a couple of slices, popping them into the toaster. 

"Morning," she said, sitting down beside him.

"Morning luv," he said, looking up at her. His expression scared Buffy for a second, he looked mortified. "What happened to your face Buffy?"

"What? Nothing, I..." she said, standing up. She walked over to the mirror by the back door and took a look at her cheek, the one that Ted had not so nicely slapped the night before. There was a visible bruise, but it appeared to be fading pretty quickly. "I - uh... It must've happened last night, at practice."

Spike stood up. "It was that wanker, wasn't it? Did he hit you Buffy?"

"If he did, he'd be dead," she said. "It's okay Spike, I'm fine."

He hesitated a minute before sitting back down again. He'd never admit to anyone, least of all Buffy, but he cared for her. A lot. And it drove him crazy every single day. He loved Dawn, he did. But there was something about Buffy that he just couldn't shake.

"Do you want some toast? Its cinnamon," she said, walking over to the toaster on the counter. He just shook his head. "So, you ready for today? I guess we're going for a drive in Ted's SUV, mom wouldn't tell me where we're going though."

"I can't stand that bloke, something's not right 'bout him," Spike said, looking down at his coffee. "Last thing I want is to be trapped in a car with him for who knows how bloody long."

Buffy sat down beside him, putting her food infront of her. "I know... he's definitely not my favourite person in the world. But, I love my mom and as long as she's happy... I just have to deal, I guess."

Spike stood up and put his mug in the sink. He headed over towards the basement door and turned to look at Buffy. "I'll see you in a bit luv."

She smiled at him and watched as he left. 

---

Buffy was finishing in her bathroom, putting the last of her make-up on when the phone rang. Letting out a sigh, she put her eyeliner down and hurried into her bedroom to answer it.

"Hello?"

'Buffy, don't hang up... please.'

"Angel, what do you want?"

'I want to talk to you. I love you.'

She laughed. "Really? You have a funny way of showing it."

'Buffy, it was a mistake. I... I don't love Cordelia.'

"Yeah, well you should. Because... Cause I'm over you Angel. I don't love you anymore. I'm not sure that I ever did." Some of that was a lie, yeah, but she just wanted him to leave her alone. And if that meant lying, then she'd do it.

'Its Spike, isn't it?'

"What? No... why would you even think that? Its because you cheated on me Angel... because you messed up! Just leave me alone, I don't want to see you or talk to you... at least not now."

'So there's hope?'

"For us? Heck no... but I may be able to stand you one day."

She hung up the phone without waiting to hear anymore from him and headed back to the bathroom. She looked at her reflection and saw herself differently for the first time. She had always been strong, but now she radiated it. 

---

"Hey Spike? You down here?" Buffy asked as she slowly crept down the basement stairs. She reached the bottom and looked around. The last time she had been here, the basement had been plain and full of storage, but Spike had really trasformed it. The walls were painted black, instead of just plain concrete and all of the boxes were neatly stacked away in the far corner. He didn't have much down there, just a cot and a dresser, but it didn't have such an empty feeling anymore. 

She saw him lying on the cot, looking over at her. "So, I'm starting to think you were just saying you did something with the place to get me down here..."

He smirked. "You're quick luv."

She smiled and sat down beside him. "Well, it is nicer. Now you just need some furniture to compliment the four walls, celing and floor."

"That the only reason you came down here? To insult me?"

She laughed. "Well, duh. I thought you were quicker then that."

They sat there for a minute in silence, staring at the wall.

"Angel cheated on me," Buffy said, suprising herself. The words just kind of fell out of her mouth. "With Cordelia... that night, that's why I was in the cemetery. I... I didn't have anywhere else to go."

He didn't say anything for a couple minutes. 

"Idiot. Why the bloody hell would he need to cheat on a girl like you?" 

"I asked myself the same question," Buffy said, smiling.

"I'm serious Buffy..." he said, sitting up beside her. "You're... perfect."

"Spike, that's so far from true."

"Is it?"

She looked over at him, into his eyes. It was almost like they were connected, theer was such a strong feeling between them that neither one could deny but they tried hard to ignore it. Buffy closed her eyes, she could feel Spike's breath close to her face and then his lips touched hers. It was electrifiying, and Buffy could feel herself let go completely. She was at total peace in his arms, in their kiss.

A noise upstairs pulled them apart and Buffy looked into his eyes for a moment before quickly jumping up off the bed.

"Oh my God... Oh my God," she said. "I... I can't do this."

"Buffy..."

She looked at him one more time before running up the stairs, slamming the door behind her. 


	9. Chapter 9

I just out of nowhere wanted to write this story again.. this is a short chapter, just trying to get back into the story and get a feel for where it's going... let me know if I should continue, because if I don't get any response then I most likely won't hah :)

---

Up in her room, Buffy was doing a double check to make sure that she hadn't forgotten anything of importance. The last thing she wanted was to be stuck in the middle of nowhere without her make-up or mp3 player, something that helped her focus when she was training.

Sighing, she let herself fall down on the bed, looking up at the ceiling. _Did I just kiss Spike? _Covering her face with a nearby pillow she let out a much needed scream. How could she betray her sister like that? If Dawn ever found out, Buffy would lose her.

"Can I come in luv?"

That voice was the last voice she wanted to hear at that moment. Sitting up, she just watched him as he made his way into the room, stopping in front of her.

"What do you want Spike?" she asked, moving herself away from him to stand by the window.

"I want to talk about what happened Buffy, we kissed."

She laughed. "Really? I didn't notice... Look, it was a mistake, I know. I'm just confused with everything that's been happening, I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry."

He appeared beside her. "Well, I'm not. That was the best damn kiss I've ever had, and I've had my share."

Buffy turned to face him and rolled her eyes. "Get over yourself. Get over this, because we aren't going to talk about it ever again. It might have been great for you Spike, but I didn't feel a thing."

"Like hell. You felt it just as much as I did Buffy, admit it," he said, lowering his gaze to meet hers.

Her body was dying to kiss him, but her brain was reminding her that he was her sister's boyfriend - which meant they could never happen.

"Spike, you're hot. Okay? I'm not going to deny that, because I'd be stupid. But other then that, there's nothing there. I made a mistake, you're Dawn's boyfriend and that isn't going to change. She's never to find out about what happened down there, got it? I'm the Slayer, remember? You'd totally regret it."

He smirked at her, as if he was enjoying it, which only made it worse. She didn't think he would give up and let her win, but he surprised her when he backed away.

"Whatever you say pet, never happened," he said, then turned and left.

Buffy sighed. "Like hell it didn't..."

---

The drive was long and even though Joyce had plenty of incredibly lame car games for them all to play, Buffy found herself dozing off shortly after they pulled out of the driveway. It was bad enough that she had to be crammed into a moving vehicle with Ted in the front seat, pretending to be husband of the year, and Spike and Dawn right in front of her, tangled up in each other's arms. Guilt ate away at her, seeing just how much her sister really loved this guy. It wasn't the first time that she'd been the "other woman" that ruined a relationship, but it was the first time that she cared about who was getting hurt. The last thing she wanted to do was cause her little sister anymore pain, she'd been through enough in her life and Buffy knew that it would kill her.

"Buffy? Wake up honey, we're here," Joyce said as she gently shook Buffy's arm.

Buffy groaned, covering her face with her arm. "What? Already? I was having a good dream too."

"You'll have plenty of time for sleep later, I want to get a good start on this weekend and I need you wide awake to do that," Joyce said, returning to the back of the car to help Ted unpack.

"Aren't I the lucky one," Buffy mumbled as she slowly slid out of the car.

Looking around at her surroundings, she raised an eyebrow. The car was stopped in what appeared to be the middle of nowhere, an enclosed area with the most trees Buffy had ever seen in her life. There were several dirt paths that led up to small cabins scattered about. It definitely wasn't the first place Buffy had in mind, she was thinking more along the lines of five star hotel in the the heart of Los Angeles, but knew the chances of that were slim.

"Hey Buff," Dawn said, smiling as she appeared beside her. "What do you think?"

"One thought... how the hell can I get out of here?"

Dawn laughed. "On the upside, there's lots of space for you to train without being noticed."

"About that... are you sure Giles doesn't mind me being gone? I don't want anyone to get hurt, maybe I should head back right now..."

"Nice try, but if I'm stuck here, then you are too. Come on, it's not that bad... Lots of fresh air, nothing to distract you from training."

_Besides your boyfriend_, Buffy thought, sighing. "I guess I can suck it up, but only because I love you... Do you think mom will notice if Ted doesn't come back with us?"

Dawn laughed before turning and heading back to where Spike was, rested up against a tree, a cigarette hanging from his mouth. Buffy let out another sigh as she pulled her cell phone out of her pocket.

_If anything God, let there be cell service... please._

As soon as she flipped it open, she felt it being snatched from her hand. Looking up at Ted, she rolled her eyes, reaching out for her phone.

He pulled his hand back. "No cell phones, this is a family trip and your mother would be extremely dissapointed if you talked through the whole thing, wouldn't she?"

She felt like lunging out and attacking him, but instead, let out a snarl. "Don't think I don't know what you're about, jerk. You're nothing but a pathetic little boy who's mother obviously didn't pay enough attention to him. If you think for one second that you can tell me what to do, you better think again... I'd watch your step, because you may think you know what I'm about, but you have no idea."

"Is that a threat?"

She didn't reply, sending him an innocent smile before walking off.


	10. Chapter 10

:) So sorry for the lack of updating, I've been without internet so I haven't been able to. But now it's all hooked up so I should be good to go and will hopefully have updates weekly (if you're interested)!

I'm not making promises for this chapter since it's been so long since I've wrote this story, it may be a little rough getting back into, but maybe someone will like it :)

* * *

She glided through the woods with incredible speed and grace, efficiently avoiding any obstacles that blocked her path. She had no destination, she simply ran, clearing her head of all thoughts and becoming one with her natural instincts. The woods surrounded her, yet it was all a blur to her eyes as she passed the scenery, not interested in the beauty of it, only concerned with her movement.

However, she was still learning to connect with her instincts and was beginning to understand that speed wasn't always a good thing when she felt herself collide with a solid object. She fell hard on her backside, knocking the breath from her lungs.

She shook her head a few times, clearing her vision, only to find a pair of brown eyes staring back at her. She noticed the solid object was actually a person who had fallen on top of her after their collision.

He removed himself from his position and quickly offered her his hand. She took it thankfully and with his help managed to bring herself to her feet.

"Sorry about that," he said apologetic. "You came so fast and I wasn't paying attention..."

She blinked a few times, ridding herself of the slight dizzy feeling in her head. Her eyes took him in, he was taller than her, with short brown hair and gorgeous brown eyes. She was a sucker for brown eyes.

"That was completely my fault, I didn't think anyone else would be out here..."

He smiled. "You're the first visitor I've seen running in the woods, it can be dangerous out here with all the trees and roots. Most people don't want to take that risk."

"What can I say? I'm a risky girl. My name's Buffy," she said, extending her hand.

He shook it gently, still holding his smile. "Drew. My grandparents own the campground, I come up here on the weekends to help them out."

She nodded. "That's really nice of you, I don't think I'd be offering my help... I don't usually do the whole wilderness thing. I got dragged into it by my mother."

"Oh, well, it didn't seem like you had much of a problem manouvering around here. You almost looked like a pro woodswoman. The woods is a beautiful place, maybe I could show you around some time?"

She smiled. "You don't even know how much I would love that."

"I better be getting back, but I'll stop by your cabin later and give you a tour of the woods at night."

"I bet that's your specialty," she said with a smirk.

He smiled again before turning to leave, "Bye Buffy."

She let out a heavy sigh. "Bye Drew."

* * *

Buffy was in the bedroom she shared with Dawn, lying on her bed, lost in a daydream. Drew was sweet, he seemed normal and he was interested in her. What more could she ask for? She needed someone to take her mind away from whatever it was she was feeling for Spike, and Drew seemed like the perfect someone to do it.

"Hey Buff," Dawn said, walking into the room. "Spike is downstairs waiting for you, he wants to get a little sparr in before it gets dark."

Buffy groaned as she sat up in the bed. "Really? I was hoping maybe we could just.. look at some diagrams?"

Dawn laughed. "I don't think that would help much. You said you were up for this Buff. Spike is really good, he can help you."

Buffy sighed as she stood and headed for the doorway. "Alright, but this better not take too long. Buffy has a date with a hot guy tonight."

Dawn let out a shriek as she ran over to her sister. "What? Details, now."

Buffy twirled a strand of her hair casually as she started to talk. "Well, his name is Drew and he works here on the weekends helping out his grandparents. I kind of ran into him, literally, when I was out in the woods and he asked me out tonight. He's going to take me on a tour of the woods... in the dark."

"Aw Buff, I'm so happy for you. You definitely need this."

"Yeah, I definitely do. So, don't wait up," she said as she headed out the door.

"Oh I will be! I want all the juicy stuff when you get back!" Dawn yelled after her.

* * *

"Lets make this quick," Buffy said as she walked down the few front steps of the cabin. Spike stood there, waiting for her, his head tilted. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"'Cause you look like you just found out that Santa Claus is real," he said, mockingly.

"Oh haha, actually, since you're so interested. I have a date. That of which I need to get ready for."

His demeanor changed from soft to dark in a matter of seconds. "What do you mean date?"

"A date. With a guy. In the woods. At night. That's what I mean," she said, and when he sent her a knowing look, she continued. "What? Did you honestly think we were going to ride off into the sunset together on a motorcycle or something? Spike that's just not realistic. I like this guy and he's an actual normal, human guy. So don't make things complicated, alright?"

He shrugged. "Wasn't intending to luv, all I did was ask. Didn't think country boy was your type though."

"He is not a country boy, he's just here helping his family... and, why am I explaining this to you? Its none of your business, so just.. drop it and hit me."

A smirk appeared on his face. "Well isn't that what every man wants to hear?"


	11. Chapter 11

Thanks for the reviews :)

* * *

Buffy walked down the stairs of the cabin and headed into the kitchen. Her training session with Spike had been just what she needed to release all of the anger she felt inside. He was good at what he did, and she couldn't deny that she learned from him, but she still felt like she was doing something wrong everytime she was around him.

When they had finished, she had hurried upstairs to get ready for her date with Drew, ignoring the hunger pains in her stomach. She always ate after training or patrolling, it was a habit for her. So once ready, she decided to grab a quick snack before heading out with Drew.

As she turned the corner to the kitchen, her smile quickly diminished when she saw Ted, appearing to cook supper.

"Buffy," he said, looking up at her. "Are you enjoying yourself here?"

She walked past him and opened one of the small cupboards, pulling out two granola bars. "Yeah, I am."

"Well that's nice to hear. Your mother is overjoyed that you haven't had any... outbursts. And I'm hoping that will continue, won't it?"

She sent him a glare as she started to eat one of the bars. "You know me, I'm unpredictable. What happens today, might not happen tomorrow."

He turned from his place at the stove to face her, watching her as she ate. "That, however, isn't nice to hear. You know how it makes me feel when your mom isn't happy. I don't want to have to..."

She stepped closer to him, interrupting him. "To what Ted? Put me in my place? I'd like to see you try. I've... come across some new skills that I never knew I had before and I seriously hope that you try something on me because I will be the one putting you in your place."

His hand lifted, but was quickly back at his side at the sound of Joyce calling his name. "In the kitchen, honey!" he yelled to her.

Buffy smiled, satisified, as she waited for her mother to come in. When she did, she walked over to her. "Mom, I'm going out with a guy named Drew tonight. He's really nice, he actually works here, helping out his grandparents with the maintenance and stuff... I don't know how late we'll be, but I promise not too late."

Joyce smiled at her. "I think that's great honey, just what you need. Have fun and be careful, okay?"

Buffy nodded. "Oh I will. Thanks mom, I love you," she said before leaving.

Joyce turned to Ted and smiled. "Well, she seems to be really adjusting to all of this, doesn't she? I know she was upste when she first found out, but this time away from the city will be good for all of us."

He nodded. "I couldn't agree more Joyce."

* * *

Buffy jumped off the sofa at the sound of someone at the door and quickly straightened herself in the hallway mirror before opening it to find Drew smiling at her.

"Hi Drew," she said, returning the smile.

"You ready?" he asked, offering her his hand.

She took hold of it and followed him outside. It felt good to be with someone normal again, someone who didn't know about all the bad things that really were happening in the world. It made her feel like a normal teenager, something she had missed since she found out she was the slayer.

"You look beautiful," he said, looking over at her.

She could feel herself blush. "Thanks Drew, so, what exactly are the plans for tonight? I feel like I should mention that Buffy and bugs are unmixy things."

He laughed. "Bugs are pretty hard to avoid when you're in the middle of the woods, but I'll try my best to keep you distracted."

She grinned. "I'm holding you to that."

"Tell me something about you," he said with a smile. "Where are you from?

"The ever interesting Sunnydale," she answered.

"Really? I moved to Sunnydale last year with my parents, so we'd be closer to my grandparents if they needed us. How come I haven't seen you around? I know I wouldn't forget a face like yours."

"I just moved back, I was... away for a bit. I guess we'll be seeing more of each other than I thought."

"Is that a bad thing or a good thing?" he asked, glancing over at her.

"Definitely good. It'll be nice to actually hang around with someone I like for a change."

He laughed. She loved his laugh - it was a real, down to earth laugh, not a fake one just meant to amuse her.

His grip on her hand tightened as they crossed over a tricky patch of roots and brush. She didn't feel the need to tell him that she had no problem with obstacles such as that - instead, she let out a slight, but efficient gasp as she faked a stumble. When she felt his arm embrace her waist, a smile formed on her lips as he carefully guided her past it.

"Thanks," she said, stopping to look up at him.

When her gaze met his, she felt her heart warm. Even though she hardly knew anything about him, she could feel that he was someone she could trust, and that made her truly happy. She didn't pull away or refuse when she saw his head moving closer to hers, instead, she closed her eyes and waited for his lips to touch hers. When they did, she felt safe and at peace in his hold.

A few seconds later, a tingley feeling came over her - she tried to ignore it at first, but knew it wasn't going away. It wasn't the type of feeling she got when he kissed her, this was different. This feeling could only mean one thing - a vampire.

Reluctantly, she pulled away from him, looking up into his eyes. "I, um, can you excuse me a minute?"

He stared down at her for a minute, trying to figure out exactly what was happening, but eventually he nodded. "Sure, just try not to go to far, it's easy to get lost out here at night. I'll be close by if you need me, just yell."

She nodded before disappearing into the woods. She walked cautiously, blindly avoiding stumps and fallen debree that would have likely caught any normal person off guard - but she was far from normal. Her hand slid to the inside of her jacket, where a stake was safely tucked into an inside pocket. She pulled it out and twirled it in her hand as she carefully scanned the area around her.

"Hey pretty girl, you lost?" came a voice behind her.

She turned quickly, to be comfronted by a bulky looking vampire who had a pleasant smirk on his face.

"Lost? No, actually I was looking for you."

His eyebrow raised. "Looking for me, huh? Not too many brave people around here, you telling me you're brave little girl?"

Buffy smiled. She didn't want to be too cocky - she was still learning a lot about being the slayer, yet she felt confident enough that she could handle one vampire on her own. "Well, yes, I do consider myself rather brave. Maybe you've heard of me, lately I've been known as the Slayer."

His smirk suddenly faded. "Oh really, Slayer you say... word did spread that a new one had been called, but I hardly thought the Slayer would leave the city to come out on a vacation."

"Sorry to disappoint. Now, can we get on with it? I have a date I need to get back to," she said as she brought her stake up.

He lunged at her, but she quickly dodged him and readied herself in her fighting stance. He turned and headed towards her, but she cut him off with a swift kick to his head, sending him stumbling to the ground. She walked over to him and when he recovered his balance, punched his jaw, sending him stumbling again. When she went to hit him a second time, he gripped her arm and forcefully brought her to the ground. She flinched as a nearby branch scratched against her face as she fell. Before she managed to get to her feet, the vampire had thrown himself onto her and grabbed her arms, pinning them to the ground.

As his fangs neared her neck, she brought her head up to connect with his, causing him to pull back in pain. With her arms now free, she hit the side of his head with her elbow and pushed him off of her. Quickly, she moved ontop of him and brought her stake up, but before she could act, he managed to grab a fistful of her hair and used it to pull him from her. Rushing to her feet, Buffy was sent staggering back when the vampire sent a kick to her stomach.

She forced herself to forget about the pain and focus on the fight she was yet to win. "Now you've done it, what am I going to tell my date when I go back looking like this? You are deader than dead jerk," she said before she jumped into the air, landing behind him. She grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled it back, reaching her stake arm around and driving it into his heart. "Hair pulling, really? That is so lame," she said as she released her grip and watched as he turned to dust.

With a sigh, Buffy attempted to straighten out her hair - although not perfect, it would have to do. She could feel the sting from several scrapes on her face and knew they would be hard to talk her way out of with Drew. The thought of just heading home and avoiding him occured to her, but she was starting to like him and didn't want to ruin the closest thing to normal she's had since becoming the slayer.

She tucked her stake safely back into the inner pocket of her jacket before turning and heading back to where Drew was waiting for her.

* * *

Buffy lazily walked up the steps towards the cottage. She was in no hurry to get inside, nor was she in the happiest mood. Drew had been concerned and surprised when he saw the shape she was in after she returned. She'd tried her best to conceal what had really happened, explaining that she'd tripped on something and fallen. He was barely convinced, but he didn't press it and she was grateful for that.

He had walked her home and left her with a soft kiss, one that she still felt on her lips. But she knew that bliss would soon disappear when she walked inside and had to face someone. She was hoping for Ted, at least he wouldn't ask her any questions. He would probably tell her she got what she deserved, however she got it. Her mother wouldn't be so easily dismissed.

Opening the door, she slipped inside as quietly as she could and immediately headed for the stairs leading to the bedroom. She was almost there when she heard movement and then his voice.

"Buffy?"

Frowning, she stepped off the last step and turned to face him. "Spike, I..."

She watched as his face fell and concern appeared. "Buffy, what happened?"

She walked past him and flopped down onto the couch, clutching her side when the pain hit her. "I ran into a vampire. It's no big deal, I'm okay."

He sat down beside her and silently inspected her wounds. "You're clearly not, let me help Buffy."

She sighed. "Fine."

He disappeared into the kitchen, and after a few minutes returned with a bowl and a cloth. He began to clean the cuts on her face when he asked, "where did this happen?"

"Deeper into the woods, I think. I was out with Drew, I don't know exactly where we were, but I just got that feeling I get when a vampire is around..." she flinched when dabbed some peroxide on the cuts. "Where do you think he came from? I mean we're in the middle of nowhere, it's not like this place screams vamp central."

He shrugged. "I don't know, but I'm going to find out. In the morning I'll do a scan of the woods."

She pulled away from him. "You mean we. I'm the slayer, remember?"

His face softened. "You're hurt luv, you need rest."

"What, this? Spike, I'll be good as new by tomorrow - I'm fine, and besides, busting vampires is kind of my job description."

He let out a frustrated sigh. "You're impossible, you know that?"

She smiled. "I've been told."

"Come here and let me clean you up, we can't have your mother seeing your face looking like that."

She leaned in closer to him, allowing him to continue what he was doing.


	12. Chapter 12

XXspuffster101XX,

Thank you so much for that, I really appreciate it and definitely needed it. I'm always up for improving :)

I don't really like the end of this chapter, but it's all I could come up with. If you're wondering, there will be Spuffy VERY soon.

Thanks to everyone else who reviewed!

-/-/-

It was the last day of the weekend, the day they finally left the camp. Buffy was excited to get back home, yet at the same time she would miss the peaceful time she got to spend out there - aside from the uneventul "bonding" trips her mother had insisted on.

Yesterday, the day after she had the encounter with the vampire, her and Spike had done a full scan of the woods but they hadn't found anything. Spike had figured the whole thing was nothing more than a coincidence and the vampire had been a strangler, feeding off campers in the area. Their conversation had been little, awkward and yet comfortable. He hadn't pushed whatever it was they had on her anymore, and she was grateful for that. There was the hope that maybe he'd forgotten, gotten over it, but she doubted that.

Buffy had went on another date with Drew after that, apologizing consistantly for the way their first one had ended. Surprisingly to her, he was understanding and assured her that it hadn't effected the way he felt about her. Even though she had only been called as the Slayer almost two weeks ago, it still felt good to hold onto a normal part of her life, one that wasn't ruined by her destiny.

She hadn't seen much of Spike after their patrol, which surprised her because he always seemed to be around. In a way she felt relieved, thinking maybe he had finally let whatever was going on between them go and enjoy his relationship with Dawn, but she also felt like something was missing when he wasn't there.

_This is all too much drama for me,_ Buffy thought as she neatly folded her clothes, ready to be packed away. _Why couldn't Spike stay in England? Why'd he have to come here, and of all people, hook up with my fifteen year old sister?_

A knock on the bedroom door pulled her from her thoughts, and she turned to see Drew standing in her doorway.

"Well hello there," she said, abandoning what she was doing to walk into his arms. He embraced her and left a gentle kiss on her forehead. "What are you doing here?"

He looked down at her. "Sick of me already? Sunnydale's a pretty small town, it won't be so easy to get rid of me once we're back there."

Buffy smiled. "Sick of you? I don't think that's possible. Have I told you how happy it makes me that you'll be in Sunnydale with me?"

He nodded. "A few times, yeah. It's nice for my ego to hear you repeat it though."

Drew was great. He was funny, smart, not to mention gorgeous. Buffy had felt an instant connection with him. Although they'd only spent one weekend together, it was beginning to feel like they'd known each other longer. She didn't know how long things would last once they were back in Sunnydale. She was, after all, the Slayer now. Giles wouldn't be very leniant on her training, just so she could go have a normal date with a normal guy.

But that didn't mean she wouldn't try.

"So when do you leave?" she asked him, pulling away from him to sit on her bed.

He walked over and sat down beside her. "Later tonight. I have to help my grandparents close the place up for the week."

Buffy nodded. "So I guess I won't see you until school on Monday then. I can't wait for you to meet Willow and Xander, they'll love you, I know it. And you already met Dawn, my sister, and her boyfriend... Spike."

He smiled. He did that a lot, and it never seemed to stop making her feel like she was important. "I'm sure your friends are great, you don't seem the type of person to hang around with anyone who isn't."

_If only you knew_, she thought.

"Hey Buff, we're leaving in - ," Dawn started, walking into the room, but stopped when she saw Drew. "Oh, hey Drew. Sorry to interrupt, I was just coming to tell you we're leaving in twenty."

Buffy looked over at her sister and nodded. "Okay, I'll be ready. We're just saying bye."

Dawn laughed. "Bye? It's like you two won't see each other for a year. It's just one night, you know?"

Buffy glared. "Okay, little sister about to get her butt kicked if she doesn't leave. Now."

"Already gone," Dawn said as she quickly left the room.

Buffy turned back to Drew. "Sorry about that, little sisters can be a major pain."

He laughed. "I wouldn't know, I've always been thankful to be an only child. No one else to compete with, or worry about."

_Again, if only you knew. I have to worry about more than just jerk boyfriends or bad hairdays. Try demons and vampires. _

"I better run, let you get packed," he said, standing.

She stood with him. "Okay. I'll see you tomorrow."

He nodded and leaned down to kiss her softly before leaving.

-/-/-

The drive home had been utter torture, not much different than the drive there. Buffy was grateful to be alone in her room again, free to go and come as she pleased with actually having somewhere to go.

She was beginning to get a little concerned. Spike had been extremely quiet for the majority of their trip, hardly saying two words to her after their patrol on Saturday. Buffy didn't expect to actually be worried that something was wrong, she should be thrilled that he wasn't hovering over her, pressing her about her feelings.

Yet, she kind of felt like she should check in on him.

She left her room and made her way down to the basement where Spike slept. She hesitated at the door in the kitchen, wondering if she shouldn't bother. With a deep breath, she pulled it open and headed down the stairs.

Spike was lying back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, a blank expression on his face. She coughed, making sure her presence was known. He looked over at her, but said nothing. She walked over and cautiously sat down beside his feet.

She fidgeted with her hands for a few seconds before looking up at him. "Um, are you okay? I know it's probably not my business or whatever, but you just haven't seemed like yourself and I thought I should... you know, check on you."

He was silent for a minute, before he spoke. "My dad's sick. Think it might be cancer."

Buffy was stunned, he hadn't mentioned his family to her at all since she'd met him. Of course, she'd never asked. "Oh. Wow, Spike, I'm so sorry. Is he... okay?"

He snorted. "Okay? He has cancer Buffy, that usually kills you."

"I know that. But there are different kinds, some you can recover from, I just..."

He looked up at her before sitting up to face her. "He's got lung cancer. Cancer. Give me a vampire, I'll stake it real good, but cancer, how can I fight that?"

"Spike, you can't let that get to you. Your dad will be taken care of, there are doctors, who I'm sure are trying their best to keep him healthy and help him. You can't think like this is your fault, or you should be able to stop it, because you can't..."

She hadn't noticed before, but his cheeks were wet with tears, and she couldn't help but feel like she should hug him, or do something. But she couldn't bring herself to it.

"You know why they left me here?" he asked, and when she shook her head, he continued. "Had nothing to do with finishing my schooling. They wanted to be rid of me, was kind of an annoyance to them, y'know? Was gonna find my own place and crash there until I could save some money to head back home, bloody hated it I met Dawn, she changed everything for me. She was so... innocent. Had no idea what she was gettin' into when she met me, but she didn't seem to care. When she found out my mum and dad had left, she begged your mum to let me stay. Took a bit of convincing, but your mum took a liking to me and agreed."

Buffy just simply nodded, not sure what to say. "Do you miss it? England?"

He laughed a little. "I don't miss who I was over there. Shortly after I met Dawn we stumbled into the vampire world, that kind of decided it for me that I wasn't going back. I wanted to be able to protect Dawn. So I trained and trained and got as good as I am now. That happened 'bout four months ago, seems like longer than that though."

"I'm sorry you got dragged into this life Spike, it's my job, you and the others shouldn't have to risk your life for what I was born to do."

He looked over into her eyes. "Buffy, I wouldn't change anything about it. I feel like I have reason now, I'm not just living to reak hell, I'm doing something."

She nodded again. "Have you told Dawn yet, about your dad?" When he shook his head, she continued. "She loves you a lot Spike, you know that right? She'll be there for you, help you."

"Dawn's a great girl, she's helped me a lot already. I think we both know this isn't going to last much longer, it just isn't the same anymore. We've drifted."

Buffy swallowed a lump in her throat - she hadn't been expecting that one. Sure, she'd noticed Dawn had stopped her consistant chatting about how amazing Spike was and how much she loved him, but Buffy figured she was just tired of talking. _Dawn, tired of talking? Listen to what you're saying to yourself Buff._

"Since when? I'm sure you guys will work everything out, I mean..."

She felt his hand on her cheek, turning her gaze to meet his. "Since you came along Buffy, things just 'aven't been the same between us. She knows it as much as I do."

Buffy pulled away from his touch. "You don't know that Spike."

"Don't make it like you know more about my relationship than I do, luv. Dawn and me don't have what it takes to be together forever."

She stood, moving away from the cot. "Please Spike, don't. Just because you and Dawn might not make it to your one year anniversary doesn't change things. We can't be together, it just... wouldn't be right."

"I never said anything about it 'aving to be right. Love isn't always right Buffy, that doesn't mean it won't work."

"I don't need this right now, I need to focus on training and becoming the best Slayer I can if I want to have much of a life. Don't make things hard, please. I like Drew, he's a good guy and I don't want to mess things up with him. I haven't had nice in a long time Spike, I need it."

He didn't say anything. She could tell he wanted to, but for some reason he let it go. She couldn't help but feel bad, he'd just found out his dad was sick with cancer. She wanted to be able to tell him what he wanted to hear, so much of her wanted to admit to herself that he was right. But she couldn't - he was still her sister's boyfriend. She didn't want to cross that line, she couldn't hurt Dawn like that.

"I'm sorry about your dad Spike, I really am. But I can't do this," she said, leaving.

Spike let out a sigh as he fell back onto his bed.

-/-/-

Two weeks had passed since the night Buffy had went down to the basement and talked with Spike. Two weeks of trying her hardest to avoid him at all costs, which proved difficult since he lived in the same house, went to the same school, and patrolled the same cememteries.

Buffy knew she had feelings for him, there was only so much that she could deny. She knew that he knew it too, and he wouldn't give up on her. A part of her didn't want him to, she wanted him to keep trying, hoping that she would someday give in and admit her true feelings. She didn't know when, or if, that would happen. But she knew she wished things were different - mainly, he wasn't her sister's boyfriend.

Slaying had been going well, she was improving with her training and that seemed to keep Giles content. He'd even allowed her to have a few nights off to spend with Drew. He never said it, but Buffy could tell he thought having a normal boyfriend who wasn't in their loop could be good for her.

Drew was a nice escape. She knew things would never last between them, it was too dangerous for him to be involved with someone like her. But it was nice to pretend for a while.

Buffy made her way down the hallways of the high school, headed for the gym. It was her most dreaded class, the one she shared with Spike. It had been difficult to avoid him over two weeks, but somehow she'd managed fine. She knew her luck wouldn't continue much longer.

She turned into the gym and saw him in the same spot he always was - leaning against the bleachers, looking very uninterested. She quickly went in the opposite direction, staying close to the far wall.

When the instructor called them into the middle of the gymnasium, she cringed, but knew he had no intentions of joining them, so she went.

The instructor started to explain how today was focused on wrestling and several mats would be scattered around the room, each student rotating from one mat to the other while one stayed behind.

_Oh great. How am I supposed to do this? Super strength over here.. I could kill someone,_ she thought as she stood up, heading over to a single mat the teacher had directed her to.

She noticed Spike wasn't assigned to one, he would be floating around the room, and surely he would choose hers. There was no avoiding him now.

Fellow students came and they went. She tried her best to go easy, allowing a couple to win, although they never would have had she tried her best. She didn't mind putting a few cocky guys in their place though, that brought a smile to her face.

When she saw Spike waiting in front of her, her smile disappeared.

"Don't take it easy on me pet," he said, smirking.

"Oh I don't intend to," she said, readying herself.

Spike lunged at her, but she doged him and he fell face first onto the mats. She wore a smirk as she waited for him to recover. When he came at her, he knocked her down, landing on top of her. She quickly rolled them over, changing their position. She gripped his wrists and held them over his head.

"What a surprise, I won."

He laughed. "Not the way I play," he said, again flipping them over once her grip on him loosened.

She landed underneath him, but as she reached for her arms, she brought her right fist up and punched his jaw, sending him tumbling to the side. She regained her footing and watched as he touched the spot on his lip that was bleeding slightly. He stood, a smile on his face.

"Well, I see you want to play my way now."

"It is more fun," she said, circling him.

He advanced, his fist connecting with her left cheek. She stumbled back a few steps but never fell. When she recovered her balance she crouched down and swept her leg around, knocking him off his feet.

She quickly landed on him, gripping his wrists and once again placing them above his head. Her legs tightened around his waist, keeping him still.

She smirked down at him, but it didn't last long when she heard a cough.

They both looked up to see the class instructor standing over them.

"Office, now," he said.

Buffy jumped to her feet, Spike followed.

"What, why? We were wrestling," she replied. "Isn't that the whole point of class today?"

"Yes, but not in the manner you two were. Punches and kicks, blood and bruises. Light wrestling was the type we were doing, that was nothing but a display of violence, which isn't tolerated in this school."

Buffy sighed. She knew better than to push the argument any further, she liked it here. She had no plans of getting expelled anytime soon. Spike stood silent behind her, having no view or complaints.

"Fine. Office it is," she said, turning and leaving the gym.

"Class could learn something from us," Spike said before he followed Buffy out.


	13. Chapter 13

Buffy stormed into the library, tossing her bag onto the counter as she walked. She stopped in front of Giles' office and let out a screach that caused the librarian to rush from his comfortable reading spot at his desk.

After a careful over look of Buffy to make sure she wasn't hurt, he let out a sigh of relief.

"Is something wrong?" he asked calmly.

Buffy glared over at him with a scowl set firmly on her face. "Is something wrong? Something wrong? No, nothing's wrong Giles, I only got stuck in detention with... him for three whole weeks!"

As Giles removed his glasses for the usual cleaning, Buffy flopped down into one of the nearby chairs.

"I'm assuming you're referring to Spike."

Buffy nodded. "He started it, you know? I was just trying to participate in class, be a good student, and there he came, Mr. ... Mr. Spike, all Spike-like. It was just an innocent fight Giles, no serious bloodshed or broken bones. Three weeks!"

"I see."

She sat still for a minute, lost in her own thoughts, before raising her head with a sly smile. "So, Giles. We're all firendly now, wouldn't you say?" Without waiting for him to answer, she continued. "Great. So, maybe you could pull some teacher strings and get me out of this? I mean, it would totally interfere with my slaying. And that would be wrong."

Giles let out another sigh, although this time, not in relief. "Buffy, I'm afraid I can't. While it will result in less training, you also need to accept the consequences of your actions. The fight may not have been brutal, as you say, but it was still against school policies and there isn't much I can do to change that. You say you want to maintain a normal life aside from slaying; this seems like an ample opportunity to do so."

"But Giles... it's not fair. Spike is just so... Spike. We really haven't been best buds lately, the last thing I want to do is spend an extra hour alone with him for THREE weeks."

"Spike may not be your favourite person Buffy, but he is a good person to have on your side when it comes to being the Slayer. This time together could be quite useful for you. Spike knows what he's doing, and he does it well. Yes, you are the Slayer, but there are things that he could teach you when I'm unavailable."

Buffy let out an exaggerated groan as she let her head fall back. "Did I mention how unfair this is?"

"Yes, yes, you did."

-/-/-

Buffy sat on the first bleacher in the gymnasium, waiting for her instructor, Mr. Lee, to show and deal her the punishment she was already dreading. Spike was still a no show. It had even crossed her mind that he might have blown it off all together. Sure, he made no attempt to hide how he felt about her, he had confronted her a number of times since they had first kissed. But, that didn't mean he would show for detention. He was still Spike. And Spike didn't follow rules all that well. Then again, he knew how much it irratated her to have him around. He'd show, she concluded, for one reason. To make this hell for her.

It was hard, hating someone that she knew she cared about. Spike had hit her hard, she hadn't been expecting him or the way he would make her feel. As much as she wanted all those feelings to just disappear, she also wanted them to stay forever. Her undeniable connection with Spike was growing stronger, and she was finding it harder and harder to keep it inside. But she had to, for Dawn and for Drew.

The sound of footsteps on the gym floor caught her attention and she looked up, catching Spike's familiar gaze. Of course. He had no intentions on making this easy for her. He knew it bugged her. She could pretend all she wanted that she didn't feel what she felt when she was with her friends and her family, but he knew. He knew her too well.

"Afternoon luv," he said with a smirk as he passed her.

She ignored him, forcing herself to focus on anything but him. She never thought she'd be that happy to see her instructor walk in, difusing the tension between them.

"Buffy, William," he said as he stopped in front of them. "Glad to see you two here, considering your track records."

Buffy spoke up. "Um, about this whole thing... Do you think it might be possible to get a seperate detention? I work better alone. And I'm all for paying for my mistakes, I really want to make this right."

Mr. Lee sent her a look that told her the answer, so she saw patiently waiting for him to continue. The quicker he spoke, the quicker this day would end.

"This isn't going to be your typical detention. Instead of sitting in a room, given the opportunity to do school work, you'll be here. Cleaning the gym. Stacking mats, tidying the storage closet. Whatever there is to do, you'll do it. Since you two seem to like the hands on technique, I thought this would better suit you."

Buffy sighed. Cleaning was definitely not her thing. But maybe this would be better, she didn't have to stay close to Spike. She had the whole gymnasium to herself to avoid him.

"Any questions or complaints?" he asked, eyeing Buffy. She shook her head in response. "Good. I suggest you two get started. I'll be back in thirty minutes to check in."

Buffy waited for him to leave before she stood and quickly headed for the girls' locker room.

"And where do you think you're going?" Spike asked from behind her.

She turned to face him. "The bathroom. Is that a problem?"

He shrugged. "Depends on if you're leaving me to do all the work."

She smiled. "Don't worry Spike, I'll take care of the heavy lifting."

Without waiting for a smirk or response from him, she turned back and disappeared.

-/-/-

Forty-five minutes later, Buffy was sitting on the bleachers, taking her turn on break. An hour of work wasn't much for her. She was used to hours of training with Giles, with minimal chances for breaks. But Mr. Lee had insisted on it, saying the school was not going to risk any chance of them being overworked. She didn't like her break. She was left to sit on the bleachers, and stare off at the gym. More precisely, at Spike.

She tried not to, she really tried. But he was working hard, lifting mats and other random equipment that had been scattered around. He had long ago abandoned his t-shirt, left to work in his undershirt that clinging tight to his muscles, damp with sweat. He was good eye candy, she definitely could not deny that. To have someone she was so attracted to only a few steps away was torture. Spike was off limits.

Buffy averted her gaze when he glanced over at her, pretending to be picking some garbage off the floor of the bleacher. After a few seconds, she looked up, to find him struggling with a large, heavy mat. She debated whether or not to help him or watch him struggle, but decided she owed him that much.

Jumping down from the bleachers, she strode over to him and with ease, lifted the mat from the ground and tossed it onto the top of the pile. She sent him a smirk as she looked him over.

"Thought you might want some help, you know, Slayer strength and all that," she said. "Why don't you go sweep something? Leave the heavy stuff for the big girls."

With a chuckle, he moved a few inches closer to her. "Oh really, go sweep something?"

She shrugged. He watched her for a few seconds with that intense stare that made her feel like he was looking into her soul, before quickly sweeping his leg out to knock her off her feet. But, she jumped, avoiding it and stood with a smile, hand on hip.

"Oops. Did I ruin your little joke?"

He was about to speak when Mr. Lee walked in, interrupting him. The two watched as he did a quick survey of the gymnasium before addressing them.

"Good. Your hour's up, you're free to go. I'll see you both tomorrow," he said, leaving.

"We're not done here," Spike said, following Buffy over to the bleacher where her jacket and bag sat.

She ignored him as she gathered up her things and headed for the door. He reached out and grabbed her arm, forcing her to stop and face him.

She glanced down at his hold on her, then back up to meet his gaze. "I think you want to let go of me Spike."

He shook his head. "I said we weren't done."

"Yeah, and I say we are."

"Buffy, come on."

She shook her head, pulling her arm free. "No. We're not doing this. I'm already late getting home, I need to get home."

He tilted his head slightly. "Why's that? Figured you'd be meeting with the watcher, or doing a quick patrol."

"Well, surprise, you figured wrong. I actually have a... A date, with Drew. I need to get home to get ready to go out with Drew. Happy?"

His smirk faded. "I think you know the answer to that luv."

She sighed as she took a few steps back, her voice softening. "You could be happy, if you wanted to be."

He laughed. "Right. I could be like you, and pretend I'm not falling in love with you; pretend I'm not thinking of you every second of every day; pretend I don't get excited everytime I'm going to see you; pretend I don't worry my bloody head off when you're out patrolling alone. Happy like that? See, Buffy, I can't do that. I don't hide my feelings well, they're there. And they aren't going away."

"Spike..."

This was becoming almost impossible. He was getting to her, he was bringing down her guards and he was getting in. She was so close to giving in to him, to giving in to her feelings. She ached to touch him, to kiss him, to tell him that she felt the same way. And then she saw Dawn. And it all came flooding back. Reality.

"I'll, um, see you later," she said quickly, turning and running from the gym.

-/-/-

Buffy laid on her bed, staring up at the blank ceiling. She was in her pyjamas, listening to her iPod, buried under layers of blankets. Trying her best to relax and gather her thoughts. Lately, they were everywhere and anywhere. And sadly enough, they all returned to the same one - Spike. He was all she could think of, he had infected her, and she couldn't get free of him. She didn't want this. She just wanted to be a normal high school girl again, meet a nice guy and fall in love. She was quickly learning that fate was a tricky thing, and it never went the way a person wanted.

She couldn't hear Dawn coming, the music flooding her ears prevented that, but she could sense her. She felt her sister's weight sit down on the bed beside her, so she turned her gaze to her and pulled the headphones from her ears.

"Hey Dawnie, what's up?"

"Oh nothing, just checking in. How was your date with Drew?" she asked.

Buffy smiled. "It was great. We had a lot of fun, he's an amazing guy," she lied. Well, partly lied. It was great, she did have fun, and he was amazing. But he wasn't Spike. Everytime she looked at Drew, she couldn't help but wish he was Spike. And that killed her. Here she had a beyond wonderful guy who was interested in her, and she couldn't be less interested in him.

"That's great Buff. You're really getting good at being the Slayer, you know? Giles was bragging about you all afternoon today. He doesn't brag often, but he was in complete brag mode."

Buffy smiled. "Hopefully he'll remember all that next time I get on his bad side."

Dawn laughed. "So, um, Buffy... I need to have a serious sister moment."

Buffy sat up, resting on her elbows. "Oh yeah? What about Dawn? Is something wrong?"

Dawn shook her head. "No... Yes... Maybe. I don't know. It's Spike."

Buffy could feel her heart sink. Had Dawn found out about what was going on between her and Spike? "Oh?" she asked.

Dawn nodded. "I love him, I really do. He's changed my life and I will never love anyone the way I loved Spike."

"Oh Dawn, he loves you... Wait, loved?"

"Yeah... that's what I'm getting at here. Spike is a great guy, he's been an amazing boyfriend and I couldn't ask for anything better. But, it's just... faded? I don't know the words for it, I don't even know if there is words for it, but I feel it. And I think he does too. I just don't think we're meant for that Buffy. At first, I was crazy about him. Completely crushing, completely in love. But now, it's like... I see him as a brother, or something. Creepy, I know."

Buffy shook her head as she placed a hand on Dawn's arm. "No Dawnie, it's not creepy at all. Are you sure? I mean, maybe you guys are just having a little rough patch. All relationships have those."

Dawn shrugged. "Maybe. But I don't think so. We're just not the same together, we can both feel it, I know it. Just the way he touches me, or looks at me. That spark is gone in his eyes Buff, and... It's gone in mine too."

"Oh Dawn, I'm sorry. You must be... heartbroken?"

Dawn laughed. "No, that's the weird part. I'm not. I feel fine. I feel like this was meant to happen. It's unexplainable. I can't put it into words, so it might sound trippy. But it's true. I don't have any plans of losing Spike, he's stuck with me whether he likes it or not. We're just both ready to move on, I think. Do you think?"

Buffy sighed as she laid back on the bed. "I don't think I'm capable to say, that's really between you and Spike. I just thought you were all madly, insanely, crazy in love with him. And now this? I think it's more of a shock to me, than you," she said with a small laugh.

"I know, it doesn't make any sense. You always told me to follow my heart, and my heart is leading me away from Spike."

"Oh, wow... Well, yeah, Dawn, whatever makes you happy. I'm all for it," she said, forcing herself to smile.

_Confusion. Complete and utter confusion_, Buffy thought.

Dawn stood, smiling. "I wanted to tell you Buffy, I had to tell you. I'm so glad you're my sister," she said, stopping in the doorway. "Good-night, I love you."

"Night Dawnie, I love you too."

Buffy waited for her sister to disappear before returning the headphones to her ears and turning up her iPod.

This was not happening.

-/-/-

Morning light seeped in through the curtains that hung from the windows, a ray left resting comfortably across her face. Her eyes fluttered open at the intrusion, then closed shut as she turned her head to escape the bright light. In a matter of seconds, the alarm went off and her arm swung quickly, knocking it to the floor.

With a groan, Buffy sat up, running her fingers through her blonde hair. While pondering on whether or not to lay back down and drift off to sleep again, her ears picked up on a muffled crying noise. At the idea of Dawn or her mother hurt, Buffy quickly sprung from the bed and headed for the stairs.

Ted was not a pleasant man, she doubted he enjoyed mornings anymore than she did. Who knew what he was capable of? Well, as long as she was alive, he would die before laying a hand on her family.

As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she turned into the living room where the noise was coming from. She saw Dawn, sitting on the sofa, wrapped in her mother's arms, crying.

Buffy stood in the doorway, her anger rising. "What happened? Is Dawn hurt?"

Joyce looked up at Buffy and quitely whispered something to Dawn, before standing and ushering Buffy into the dining room.

"It's Spike," she said, trying to keep her voice down.

"Spike? He wouldn't hurt..."

"He didn't hurt Dawn, Buffy," she said, reaching out and touching her daughter's arm. "Spike was in an accident."

Buffy felt as if she'd lost the ability to move or speak. A cold chill ran down her spine and through her entire body as Joyce tried to bring her daughter into a comforting embrace.

"Wh-What kind of accident?" she asked, scared of the answer.

"We're not quite sure. He was attacked, he was badly beaten Buffy... I'm sorry honey, I know you two..."

"I have to see him," Buffy said, pulling away from her mother's hold. "Can you take me to the hospital? I just... I need to see him."

Joyce nodded. "Okay Buffy. I-I don't think Dawn will want to just yet, she doesn't think she could handle seeing him that way. Do you want to change first, maybe take a shower?"

Buffy simply shook her head as she grabbed her jacket off the banister and headed out the door, Joyce following behind her.


	14. Chapter 14

As Buffy walked down the hallways of the hospital, everything had become a blur. She didn't see anyone, didn't hear anyone. All she could focus on was Spike. Was he okay? Was he dead? What happened? Did a vampire get him? There were so many possible things that could've happened, so many things her mother could never imagine. If Spike was hurt, it was her fault. She was the Slayer, it was her duty to protect humans, protect him.

"Buffy," she heard her mother calling her name and stopped to look at her. "Buffy, are you sure you want to do this? You don't seem well."

Buffy shook her head. "I'm fine mom, I need to see him."

Joyce nodded. "Alright, this is his room. The nurse said he's in and out of conciousness, so we may or may not be able to speak to him."

Buffy nodded, barely listening to her. "Can I see him alone?"

Joyce hesitated, but agreed, offering to go grab some coffee and wait for Buffy in the waiting room. Again, she barely heard her mother, she was too focused on the questions repeating in her head. Too worried for him. The memory of what he'd said to her that day stuck in her brain, 'pretend I don't worry my bloody head off when you're out patrolling alone'. He was out patrolling alone.

After taking a deep breath, she slowly stepped in the hospital room, careful not to disturb him incase he was asleep. When she passed the curtain that was pulled halfway around his bed for privacy, she saw him. Lying there, his face swollen and purple. There was no sign of what Spike had looked like, no chisel-like cheekbones, or piercing blue eyes... He was so vulnerable, so hurt. It broke her hear to see him like this. It broke her heart to know she could've prevented it.

Carefully, she stepped around the bed, moving closer to his side. She stopped and hesitated before gently running her hand over his hair, leaning down to whisper in his ear.

"I'm so sorry Spike. I should've protected you."

"Nothing... you... could've... done Buffy."

She jumped slightly at the sound of his voice, raspy and quiet, but recognizable. She watched closely as he slowly opened his eyes, as much as they would, to look up at her.

She could feel a tear fall down her cheek, and made no attempt to hide it. She wasn't even sure if he could see it, but she didn't care anymore.

"Spike, I'm the Slayer. I failed, I... let this happen to you. I..."

He slowly lifted his arm and reached out to her, placing it ontop of her hand that rested on the bed rail.

"No. This wasn't... your fault... I should've been... better," he managed, desperately wanting her to understand he didn't blame her.

"You can say that all you want, but you know me well enough to know I don't believe it. Look at you," she said quietly, her gaze travelling over his body. "I... who did this to you?"

He shook his head.

"Tell me Spike. Who did this?" Her rage was beginning to take over her pain, she wanted revenge on whoever did this. Vampire, human, demon - whoever caused Spike to be here, would die. And she had no intentions on making it quick.

"Doesn't matter."

"Doesn't matter? You're barely alive! You could've... you could be dead Spike," she said, in barely a whisper.

"I'm not... am I?" he sighed as he tried to sit up, flinching from the burning pain in his ribs.

Buffy placed a hand on his shoulder and gently pushed him back down on the bed. "You need to rest. I'll be back."

She turned to leave, but stopped when she heard him speak. "How's Dawn?"

"Shaken. She couldn't see you like this, it would break her."

"And you?" he asked.

She turned, looking away from him, and said. "I'm already broken."

-/-/-

"Giles?!" Buffy yelled as she burst into the library, the doors barely left on the hinges.

He appeared from his office, holding an open book in his hands. "Buffy, I heard about Spike. How is he?"

"Not good," she said, tossing her jacket on the nearby chair. "I want to find whoever did this and kill them."

Giles nodded. "I understand. I've been doing some research."

"And?" she asked, impatiently.

"And, nothing yet. Willow is on her way, Xander too. We'll find whatever is responsible and take care of it," he said, with a soft smile. "How are you Buffy?"

She ran her fingers through her hair as she sat down in the chair, covering her face with her hands.

"You should've see him Giles... He was like... Like he wasn't even Spike. I've seen dead people, I've seen people hurt. But seeing Spike lying there in that bed, all beaten up and in pain, I just... Hurt for him."

He nodded, listening to her as she spoke. "It will be okay, Spike is strong, he will pull through."

"I know. I know."

_But will I?_

-/-/-

"I'm sorry Drew, I really am," Buffy said, over the phone, as she explained to Drew what had happened with Spike. "I'm just going to stay at the hospital for a bit, be with him. Okay. Thank you. I'll tell him. Okay. I will, I promise. Bye."

Buffy hung up the payphone and started her walk back to Spike's room. She saw her mother sitting in the waiting room and made her way over to her. Joyce stood when she saw Buffy coming, and handed her daughter a coffee.

"Thanks mom," she said, sipping on it carefully.

"Buffy, why don't you come home with me? Get some rest, and come and see him tomorrow?"

Buffy shook her head. "No, mom. He doesn't have any family. He shouldn't be alone right now, not after what happened. The least I can do for him is stay. It is my fault he's in here."

"Oh honey, you need to stop blaming yourself. You can't save everyone, things happen. Bad things. It's not your job to save the world."

_Actually, it kind of is. _"I know. I just wish I could've helped him. I promise I'll stop by tomorrow and catch up on some sleep. Okay?"

Joyce nodded. "Alright Buffy. I love you."

"Love you too mom," she said, watching as her mother left.

Coffee in hand, Buffy headed towards Spike's room. Since this morning, when she'd first found out about Spike's condition, she'd only spent an hour away from the hospital, and that was to question Giles on Spike's condition. She felt guilty. But more so, she felt sad. Spike had no family here, he had no one. Except for her. And Dawn, of course. But when it was just her and Spike, it all felt right. Complete silence was peaceful, not awkward, and their bickering was something she looked forward to.

Maybe it was the realization that Spike could be taken away from her quicker then she thought possible that brought out her emotions. Or maybe she was just tired of keeping them all in. She hadn't made a full confessional to Spike, and had no real intentions on doing so, but she knew he could sense that her guard was falling and so was she.

"Hi," she said, turning the corner to reach his bed.

He looked over at her and smiled, even though it seemed to cause him pain. "'Ey pet."

"Um, I was thinking, if you wanted me to, that I would stay with you... For the night. I don't feel right leaving you here alone, not after all that just happened. You need someone, and, well, looks like you got me."

She thought she saw him smirk, but couldn't be sure. "Lucky me."

"You don't look all that lucky to me. Too bad I couldn't lend you some Slayer power, get you healed up in no time," she said, sitting down in the chair beside him.

"Thank you."

She raised an eyebrow. "For what?"

"Saving me."

Okay, now she was confused.

"Spike, I didn't save you. Someone randomly found you in the cemetery, they called 911."

"That's not what... I mean. This, right... now. Saving me."

She smiled softly. "Spike, I don't... you're welcome." She couldn't argue with him, not now. She didn't see herself as saving him, but if he felt that way, then who was she to tell him otherwise? "So, what can you eat?"

"Anything that fits... through a straw," he said with a wink.

"Aw darn. And here I was going to get us some pizza, but, I wouldn't feel right eating that delicious food in front of you, when all you can eat is liquid goo. Hey, can you put pizza in a blender?"

Spike smiled. And just like that, Buffy felt her heart warm. Seeing him smile, making him smile, made her feel like she was doing something right for a change.


	15. Chapter 15

**AN:** Aw, thanks for the reviews :) I'm glad you like it, I enjoy writing it. It's a really big stress reliever for me.

-/-/-

A reoccuring sound caused Buffy to stir in her sleep, pulling her out of her dreams. Slowly, she opened her eyes, taking in her surroundings. She was curled up in the uncomfortable hospital chair beside Spike's bed. She sighed as she sat up, resting her arms on the bed rail as she glanced down at him. At first she thought he might have been awake, but once she took a closer look at him, she realized he wasn't. He seemed to be mumbling something and his face was scrunched up as if he was having a bad dream.

Carefully, she moved from her spot in the chair to sit beside him, gently running her hand through his hair as she calmy spoke his name repeatedly.

He looked so vulnerable, so helpless to her right then, all she wanted to do was hold him. She wanted to make sure he knew that she was there, watching over him, that she would keep him safe.

Slowly, she pulled her body up the bed, resting beside him as she gently lifted his head, placing her arm underneath it.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm here Spike, and I promise that I will never let anything like this happen to you again. I'll protect you," she whispered, as she waited for him to settle.

Once he did, she allowed herself to drift back to sleep, holding him safely in her arms.

-/-/-

"Ahem."

The familiar voice caused Buffy's eyes to flutter open suddenly and she quickly sat up. She looked towards the doorway of the room to see Giles awkwardly staring back at her. Her gaze turned down to Spike, who was still asleep, then back to Giles as she slipped away from her place beside him.

She walked over to where Giles stood and quietly followed him out into the hallway.

"Giles, I can explain," she started, but he raised a hand to stop her.

"Buffy, it's quite alright, I'd perhaps not want to know. I was paying Spike a visit to learn something about his attacker. If it was a demon, vampire, or human by chance?"

Buffy nodded. "Okay, he's still sleeping right now, but I'm sure he'll be up soon. I can just wait for him, since I'm already here, if you want to head back to the library and keep up the researching. I'll let you know what I can get from him."

"Right. Buffy, whatever this was, we'll find it. Until then, I'd rather not have you out alone on patrols. If Spike was brought down, there is no saying what could happen," he said.

Buffy nodded. "Yeah, okay, sure Giles."

After they shared a silent smile, Giles left, and Buffy returned to Spike's room. As she was looking out the window, down at the people who were walking around, she heard Spike move behind her. Turning, she saw him watching her with a smile on his face.

"You're up," she said, moving to sit beside him.

"Something was missing," he said, glancing down at the empty spot beside him.

"Oh, right. Yeah, last night, you were kind of having a bad dream or something, so I thought maybe if I laid down beside you it would help you calm down," she said, shyly.

"And?"

"And, you stopped, so I'd say it worked. There's nothing a little Buffy charm can't fix," she said with a smile.

"Not gonna argue there," he said. "Was that Giles?"

She nodded. "He wanted some info on whatever attacked you last night. I told him I'd get it from you once you woke up and then report back to him like a good Slayer."

"Don't remember much... It happened pretty quick, nasty bugger."

"Do you think it was a vamp?"

He nodded. "If I had to guess, yeah. I haven't fought many demons, but a human couldn't come up with that strength."

She smiled down at him. "Your voice sounds better, not so raspy and annoying," she teased.

"Why thanks, luv. A night with barely getting a word in, what with your big mouth, sure works magic."

"Very cute. Think you can survive an hour or two without my big mouth to keep you quiet?" she said, standing.

He watched her as she moved to grab her coat. "I'm sure I can find one of 'em cute candy girls to fill in for you while you're gone."

Buffy looked over at him and raised an eyebrow. "I used to be one of those candy girls, a long time ago. Trust me, they aren't as innocent as they appear."

"'s what I was countin' on luv," he said with a smirk.

Buffy sent him a glare. "Perv. You're lucky you're already damaged or you would be feeling some serious pain."

"Jealous?"

She scoffed. "No, I couldn't be more unjealous. You just... need your rest."

His smirk turned into a warm smile. "I'm only teasing pet, you know you're the only candy girl I want."

She laughed. "I'll see you in a bit Spike."

He watched her with a comfortable smile as she left.

-/-/-

After a nice, long, relaxing hot shower, Buffy headed down to the kitchen to grab some real food to eat. The vending machines and hospital food she'd ate last night were not satisfying her, so she wanted to fill up on goodies before returning to the hospital.

She was about to open the fridge when someone entered the kitchen. With a sigh, already knowing who it was, she turned to face him.

"I am really not in the mood for one of our love-filled talks," she said with a scowl.

Ted only smiled, appearing to enjoy her frustration with him.

"Oh Buffy, what would make you think I loved you?"

"My bad, I forgot who I was dealing with. That was sarcasm, maybe you've heard it before? Most likely from me, I happen to be queen of sarcasm. It's one of my preferable titles, compared to some others I've been known for."

"Like, little bitch, perhaps? That's one of my favourites," he mocked, approaching her.

"Listen, Ted, I warned you, but you are really starting to get on my last nerve. I tried playing nice for my mother's sake, but you just don't get it, do you? Spike is in the hospital, which right there, instant bad mood. You don't want to mess with me, I promise you," she said, closing the space between them.

When Ted raised his hand to strike her, she quickly grabbed his arm and forcefully turned his body, pinning him against the wall. She smiled uncontrollably as he struggled underneath her hold. After a few seconds, she grew bored and released him, backing away just enough to still prevent another attack.

"You're going to regret that," he growled, lunging at her. Swiftly, she moved away from his path, sending him stumbling into the island. He recovered his balance and reached for her, grabbing her arm, pulling her into him. "Someone needs to be taught a little lesson," he whispered into her ear as he grabbed a fistful of her hair, using his strength to hold her still while he readied himself to punch her in the stomach.

That was what Buffy was hoping for, and with quick speed, she brought her free arm up to grab his hand with hers, squeezing with all her strength. She could hear a bone or two snap in her grip, and as he released his hold on her hair, she pushed him forcefully, sending him flying into a nearby wall.

Buffy walked over to him and raised her right arm, landing a punch on his left cheek. Then, she used her knee to send a powerful kick straight to his groin. As he fell to his knees in pain, she backed away a few feet, looking down at him.

"Do you get it now Ted? I am the last person you want to mess with, and hopefully, for your sake, you won't pull anymore of your stupid little stunts," she said, waiting for a response. He nodded his head, unable to speak from the pain. She smiled to herself as she left the kitchen and headed back upstairs to fix her hair.

_He's lucky I didn't spend hours on my hair or he would've been in a world of pain by the time I was finished with him. He should be counting his lucky stars right about now. Just wait til mom sees him, I wonder what his excuse will be? Your daughter kicked my ass?_

-/-/-

Buffy walked down the hallway to Spike's room, carrying a paper bag and a large smoothie. She figured Spike might enjoy something with a bit of flavour to it, so she stopped on her walk there and picked one up. The bag held her food from home, something she had almost forgotten about after her encounter with Ted. She had managed to avoid him, or more like, him avoid her, while she quickly fixed something to bring with her.

Once she had her food, she'd stopped by the library to see Giles and let him know what Spike had told her. It wasn't a lot to go on, but at least it narrowed it down to vampires. Cause there was a big shortage of those on the Hellmouth.

She turned into Spike's room with a smile on her face. That was something she'd been doing a lot in the past day or so, smiling. Crazy, since Spike was in the hospital, beaten nearly to death. Maybe that's what it was, she realized how much he truly meant to her, and how much it would kill her to lose him. She hadn't been so hostile towards him, she was starting to let her feelings come out, even if just a little at a time.

"Hey Spike, I stopped at the..." Buffy started, but cut herself off when she saw Dawn sitting on the bed beside Spike. "Dawn, I was just..."

"Hey Buff," she said, standing. "I wanted to come see him with my own eyes, you know, make sure he was really okay. Apparently you're taking good care of him."

Buffy smiled as she rested the paper bag and smoothie on the bedside table. "A little pillow fluff here and there, no brain surgery or anything."

Dawn laughed as she gave her sister a hug. "Thank you, for being strong when I couldn't be. He was lucky to have you, the first night has got to be the worst. I can't even imagine what kind of pain he's in, but with you around, I know he'll be okay."

"It's really nothing, I just... I'm the Slayer, what more can I say? If the bad guy wanted to come back and finish the job, I wanted to be here to... protect him this time."

Dawn nodded. "I understand. Well, I should probably take off, school and all. One of us should be there, we don't want mom to worry."

Buffy smiled. "Yeah, you go ahead. I'll stay with him."

Dawn walked over to Spike and gently kissed him on the cheek. "I'll come in tomorrow and see how you're doing."

He nodded. "Alright pet, don't worry about me. Get some rest."

"Okay, bye Spike," she said, returning to her sister. "I'll see you later Buff, call me, okay?"

Buffy nodded. "I will. Say hi to Willow and Xander for me?"

"Of course," Dawn said, and with one last wave, she left.

Buffy walked over to the chair beside the bed and sat down. "So, I brought you a smoothie," she said, handing it to him. "I thought you might enjoy something with a little more yum and a lot less ick."

He laughed. "Sounds great Buffy. You didn't have to come back you know."

"Yeah, I know... but I wanted to. Besides, you're an easy excuse for missing class. Can't get much better than 'friend near death'."

"Near death, eh? Guess I should fight a little worse."

She smiled softly. "How's the pain?"

He gave her a smirk. "The great thing about hospitals is there's never any drug shortage. Nurse keeps upping the pain medication, almost don't feel a thing."

"Well, that's better than feeling it. I bet Ted could use some of those drugs right now too," she said with a smile.

Spike raised an eyebrow. "Care to elaborate luv?"

She shrugged as she laid back in the chair. "No biggie, we just got into a little scuffle. Trust me when I say he will not be wanting to see me for a while."

"That's my girl. Finally gave him a taste of who you really are."

_That's my girl? I'm his girl now? Huh. That doesn't sound so bad, kind of sounds... nice, _she thought. "Yeah, um, I need caffiene. I'm way overdue for my regular intake. Do you want anything? Or, right... you're kind of limited."

He laughed. "You really enjoy rubbing that one in."

She sent him a smile as she stood up, heading to the door. "It's just so easy and so entertaining."

"You just wait til I get out of this bloody bed," he said with a smirk as he watched her leave.

-/-/-

Buffy stood outside of Spike's room. She had been about to walk in when she heard him in the middle of a conversation with someone. She couldn't hear the other person's voice, so she assumed it was over the phone. Quietly, she waited outside, listening.

"There was something I didn't mention to Buffy," Spike said. "Yeah, well, I couldn't. Once you hear it, you'll understand. Just, listen Giles. The vamp, he didn't drain me because he had a message. Yeah, a message. For the Slayer... Buffy. What kind? Not a very good one. He told me to let her know that she was next. Yeah, I know. Yeah, that's why I didn't tell her... Well, I don't know, that's your job isn't it? Alright," he finished, then there was silence.

All of a sudden Buffy felt dizzy, weak and angry all at the same time. She was next? What the hell did that mean? Obviously it meant that vampire had intentions to come after her, but when? Spike was a good fighter, better than good, he was great. If that vampire could do that to Spike, what could it do to her? Slayer blood was a delicacy amoung vampires, she knew that.

After taking a deep breath, she walked into Spike's room and set her coffee down on the table. He watched her closely, noticing the worried expression on her face.

"Something wrong luv?" he asked.

She glared at him as she walked over to the window. "Like you don't know Spike. Since when do you keep secrets from me?"

She could hear him let out a sigh behind her. She didn't want to look at him, she knew exactly why he hadn't told her, and that was because he didn't want her worrying about something he couldn't be sure of.

"Buffy, I never..."

"Meant for me to find out?" she asked, turning to face him.

"No. I never meant to keep it from you. But, this is big. I don't know who this vamp is or what he's capable of. I can't..."

"Can't what Spike?" she asked, hand placed firmly on her hip now.

He sighed again as he looked up at her. "I can't protect you from him. I'm stuck in this bed, and even if I wasn't, look what he did to me the first time. I can't protect you from him Buffy, and that... that bloody well frightens me."

"Spike, I don't need you to protect me," she said quietly, sitting down beside him on the bed. "I'm the Slayer, I'm supposed to protect you and everyone else from things like this. Because you were out doing my job, you got hurt. I should've been out there, I should've fought him..."

"And you could be dead."

There was a silence between them. She knew it was true, she hadn't been training that long. It had only been a month since she found out she was the Slayer, and now she had a dangerous vampire breathing down her neck. How the hell could she handle that?

"Maybe," she said, looking up at him. "But I can't just sit around and let him hurt someone else, or worse. What if he goes after Dawn, or Willow, or Xander? Hm? I can't just hide because there's a vampire who wants to kill me. Every vampire out there wants to kill me, I slay them, of course they do."

"You need more training. You can't rely on instinct alone with vampires like this, it's not enough," he said, softly.

She knew that, but hearing him say it just made it seem more real. Despite whether she'd win or lose, live or die, she had to fight. There was no turning back now, this vampire was not going away, and he would only kill more people to get his point across. How much time she had, she didn't know, but what she did know, was that she needed to practice. She needed to get better, or she wouldn't be alive much longer.

Her eyes were focused on her hands, they were shaking. She didn't want to cry, she tried to hold the tears in, but this was all too much. She looked up at him, a tear quietly falling from her eye.

"I'm scared Spike. I don't want to die, I don't... want to die."

Spike rearanged himself in the bed to make space for her to crawl up beside him. Carefully, he lifted his arm and she gently rested her head on his chest, above his heart. He wrapped his arm securely around her small form and softly kissed her forehead.

"We'll figure something out luv, don't worry. I won't let you die," he whispered.

She turned her head and looked up into his eyes. "Spike... I think I love you."

-/-/-

**AN:** So? Please review and let me know? Not sure where I'm going with this, just kind of going.


	16. Author's Note

Hey, no update yet, just wanted to post this and let all the people who read my story know that I have completed it, I wrote it up by hand because I'm lacking a computer right now. I've been busy with school so no time to type it up at my sister's place, but now that I'm done I'll be doing that soon. I know it's been a LONG time since my last update, so hopefully some people are still interested and I'd say it'll be up by next week :) Thanks!


	17. Chapter 16

a/n: Thanks for all the supportive reviews :) I appreciate it. Ok, so I had this chapter all wrote up and then... I LOST it! So I'm starting from scratch for this one. Bear with me lol. This chapter if pretty short, but there will be another soon.

* * *

"Spike, I think I love you," Buffy said, looking up at him with tears in her eyes. She expected a response; a smile; a nod - something. But nothing came. She was starting to think that maybe saying it out loud was a mistake. "I'm sorry... I should go. I don't know what I was thinking, I..."

Buffy moved to stand up, but Spike gently took hold of her arm and pulled her back beside him.

"Buffy, I think I love you too," he said with a smile. "I never expected to hear those words come from your mouth pet, that's all. It surprised me, but don't think I don't love you."

"I never expected to say them. I just... I guess with you being hurt, it made me realize that I could lose you. We don't have a normal life, we aren't normal people. It's a dangerous world and we're right in the middle of it. I never wanted this Spike, I never wanted to fall in love with you... but I can't keep it in anymore. It's scary, and I don't know what it means... but you need to know."

Was this real? Had she really just told Spike that she _loved_ him? She couldn't take it back now - she couldn't deny it any longer. Now he knew how she really felt; and what frustrated her the most was that she was happy about it.

Spike ran his fingers in a smooth pattern along the crook of her lower back. "Love's not a demon, you can't fight it. Love will follow you around until you let it in; love won't give up. 'S 'bout time you figured that out Slayer."

She reached over and smacked him gently on the face. "You're lucky I figured it out at all. So don't start complaining or I might just get a case of amnesia and forget this whole thing happened."

Spike smirked down at her as he pulled her body up closer to his. "Well, we'll have to make sure that doesn't happen."

"Oh, and how will we manage that?"

He gently reached up and touched her cheek, "I have one bloody brillant idea." Buffy waited, looking into his eyes as he brought his lips closer to hers and kissed her softly.

* * *

Willow looked up from the book she was reading as Giles walked out of his office and joined her at the table in the library. He wore a look of concern that worried her.

"I just recieved a phone call from Spike," he started. "He informed me of some particularly imporatant details from the attack."

"And?..."

"Well, it seems that the vampire who attacked Spike chose not to kill him because he wanted a message to be passed to the Slayer - Buffy."

Willow crinkled her brow as she closed the book in front of her. "Giles, you're being all cryptive guy and I don't like it... what's going on?"

He sighed as he routinely removed his glasses and cleaned them on his shirt. "Spike's attacker kept him alive so that he could tell the Slayer personally that she was next."

"Next? What does... Oh God, Giles. What are we going to do?" Willow asked in a panic.

"Research. We need to find out who this vampire is, what he's capable of and if we can, his attack pattern. Telling by the extent of Spike's injuries we already know that we're not dealing with an average vampire. He must be an experienced fighter, and until we can find out more, I want this matter to be taken extremely serious."

Willow nodded. "Should we tell Buffy?"

"No, not yet. We should gather as much information as possible before telling her. You should do a search on the net and see if anything of imporance can be found."

"I'll see what I can do. How's Buffy? Did Spike say? I haven't heard from her... I'm worried. I mean, I know we haven't been close for a long time, but when she came back... she was different Giles, and she actually _wanted_ to be my friend."

Giles smiled. "I believe she has the same feeling about you Willow."

* * *

Buffy smiled up at Spike as she laid beside him in the bed, cradled in his arms.

It was their last night there; tomorrow Spike would be back home in the basement, school would be mandatory again, and contact with Drew would be unavoidable. Life would simply be back to the way it was before the accident. It felt like the time they'd spent together in the hospital had been an escape from reality. Buffy had no idea what would happen once they were forced to return to it.

"Spike, what are gonna be like once everything is... real again? We can't just be like 'oh yeah, we kind of love each other'. I don't want anyone to get hurt - mainly Dawnie," she said quietly.

"I know pet, but it will all work out. If you want to lay low for a bit, that's fine with me. I can keep a secret," he said.

"I don't want to keep it a secret Spike, honest. I'm just not ready for everyone to know yet. It feels good, being alone with you. I don't want it to get all ruined."

He nodded. "I understand Buffy. Besides, your main focus should be slaying. You need to prepare for whatever this vamp has planned. Me and you, that will never change. I promise you," he said, squeezing her lightly.

"I'll hold you to that. How about some food? I could do for some refueling. And I hear you're allowed some semi-solids now that those ribs are healing nicely. You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you're the one with the super healing power. You've got some good genes... super genes," she said, changing the mood of the conversation. She didn't want to be sad - she wanted to be happy. Lucky for her, Spike made her feel that way.

He could tell when she was upset and needed to be cheered up. And he never pestered her for an explanation - unless he knew he had to.

"Sure thing luv. I'll come with you, a walk sounds nice."

"Think you can handle it? I move pretty quick, I wouldnt want you to fall and hurt yourself some more," she teased as she stood.

"You just wait Slayer, once I'm all healed up I'll show you a thing or two about falling," he said with a smirk.

She laughed as she helped him get up out of the bed.

"I hope that's another promise 'cause I look forward to seeing you try."

Once standing, he reached over and brought her into an embrace. "I don't try," he whispered into her ear, "I do. Remeber that when I'm kicking your cute little ass... Slayer."

"Oh I will big boy. But let's focus on the most imporant thing right now - getting some yummy in my tummy."


	18. Chapter 17

So sorry for the lack of updates- been without internet yet again, but now Im back and Im getting all the chapters that Ive written up. Enoy and let me know what you think!

* * *

"So, this vamp is pretty much a 'Vampire Slayer' slayer?" Xander asked, looking from Giles to Willow.

The three were in the high school library trying to dig up as much information about the infamous vampire that was lurking around Sunnydale. It hadn't been difficult, he had quite a past that left behind a trail of horrendous attacks and deaths. His name was Alric, and just the sound of his name would strike fear in the hearts of whoever had lived to know his nature. Alric wasn't a stupid vampire; he didn't kill people in the normal fashion a vampire would. He killed to survive until he found what he was looking for - the Slayer.

"Yeah, I guess you could, uh, put it that way. The main point here is he's dangerous. What he did to Spike was nothing compared to what he's capable of. He's killed four Slayers in the past - he must be like one hundred years old," Willow said.

"Eighty-nine," Giles corrected. "He is quite ruthless when it comes to a Slayer. Generally, he appears to tease them; make them worry about when and how he'll strike."

"If Buffy knew she'd never sleep. Can't we just... not tell her?" Willow asked, worried.

"While I agree it is a troublesome thought, Buffy needs to prepare herself for what is coming. If she is unaware, then her chances of being able to protect herself from him are slim. This is her calling; it is her duty to protect others from demons such as this."

"But... she's only been a Slayer for a little over a month now Giles. There's no way she can prepare herself for something like this. He has eighty-nine years of experience as a vampire - he has to be good," Willow said.

"I don't like this. I really, really, _really_ don't like this," Xander mumbled to himself as he paced the library floor.

"I will train Buffy to the best of my ability in order to prepare her for the fight that will indefinitely come. However, only she is the Slayer, and she will have to rely on herself and her gift if she wants to win this battle," Giles said, sitting beside Willow.

"But we'll help her right? I mean, we've been doing the slaying stuff for a while now..." Willow suggested, but Giles sadly shook his head.

"This is far too dangerous Willow. Spike's fighting skills are far better than any of ours and look at what happened to him. If we put ourselves in this with Buffy, I'm afraid in the end we will only distract her from what she must do."

"So, we tell her... when?" Xander asked.

"Soon."

* * *

Buffy sat on her bed, flipping through the endless pile of homework Dawn had delivered. She had only missed a week of school, but it seemed her teachers had it out for her -there was no way she would finish all of this in three days.

She sighed as she fell back, looking up at the ceiling blankly. She needed to focus on school - it was the only normal thing she had to cling to in her life. However, her mind apparently had a different idea because the only thought that was consistant was Spike.

Buffy hated loving him. She hated the way he made her feel; the way he _always_ knew what she was thinking before she even said anything; but most of all - she hated the way he loved her. No matter how many times she had put him down over the past two months, Spike never stopped loving her. He cared for her in a way that no one else did, and it scared her.

Who was she kidding? The only thing she hated was that she was too afraid to tell everyone in her life that Spike was the _only_ person she wanted to be with.

_Knock Knock._

"Come in," Buffy called, sitting up.

Joyce walked in and lingered around the doorway. "There's a handsome young man downstairs asking for you."

Buffy thought for a minute. "Drew? Why is he here?"

"Well I'm pretty sure he's not here to see me," Joyce said with a smile.

"Right. Um, I should probably go see what he wants..."

Buffy stood up and passed her mother as she headed downstairs. Drew was sitting quietly on the sofa, waiting for her.

"Drew, hi," she said as she walked into the living room.

"Hey Buffy, I haven't heard from you since you called to tell me Spike was in the hospital... I tried calling but there was no answer, so I wanted to drop by and see if everything was okay with you."

Buffy smiled. He was sweet. The way he looked at her it just didn't seem right to end things that way. "I'm sorry, I've been really busy catching up on school work. I meant to call..."

He smiled as he stood up and walked over to her. "It's alright, I understand. I thought you might want to go out tonight."

_Tonight? How can I let him down easily? Going out is the last thing I want to do tonight... besides the fact that Giles forbid me to until things were straightened away with my stalker._

"I'd love to Drew, really... but my mom is seriously on me about getting caught up with school. If I don't get some reading done for History, I'm going to be a part of it. What about tomorrow?" she asked, surely Giles will have found _something _by then.

Drew nodded. "Sure, tomorrow night sounds great Buffy."

Buffy agreed, and after a brief hug, Drew was gone. She shut the door, but before she could turn around, she felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist from behind.

"Thought he'd never leave," Spike whispered in her ear.

She turned in his hold to face him. "What are you doing? Someone could see you..."

He smirked at her before gently placing kisses along her neck. "Oh right, 's all hush hush, wouldn't want the wanker to find out. He's lucky I'm not myself right now or I would've-.."

"Been a good boy - Slayer present," she said, cutting him off.

"I think you know quite well luv, you don't scare me."

"I should. Let's get you back downstairs before I'm tempted to show you why," she said, taking his hand.

"Aren't you scared someone will see?" He mocked, and she laughed.

"I'm holding your hand, not preparing to give you a hickey."

"You wish," he teased as they headed down the stairs to the basement.

Buffy watched as Spike sat down on his bed before asking, "Do you need anything?"

He nodded. "I think I've been having some of those night terrors again. Having the Slayer hold me while I sleep sounds very... pleasant."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "As much fun as that sounds - liar- I have to study."

He laughed. "You, study? That's an amusing thought."

She glared at him, crossing her arms. "Funny. Now, do you need anything besides my company before I leave?"

"I can think of a few... well, I suppose those ideas do involve you," he said, with the look in his eyes that always gave her goosebumps - the good kind.

With a sigh, she unfolded her arms. "I guess I could stay for a few minutes."

Spike patted the empty spot beside him with a smirk, and she couldn't help but smile as she walked over and sat down beside him.

"So, do I want to know what those ideas of yours are?" she asked. "Or should I get the gist?"

"Well luv, that depends on what you like. I thought you might care to help ease my pain by focusing my mind on something else... your lips, for example," he said with a seductive smile.

Buffy took a minute to consider his request. On one hand, kissing Spike in the house they shared with her unsuspecting family wasn't a smart idea. But on the other hand, she really enjoyed kissing Spike.

"Helping the helpless is my duty," she said with a smirk.

"That's my candy girl," he said, pulling her down on top of him.

* * *

The sun was just beginning to set as Buffy walked out her front door. The wind was a little cook, so she was thankful her mother had nagged her to wear a jacket. She liked jackets anyways, they made it much easier to hide her stakes. She intended to be fully prepared incase her vampire stalker decided to mae an appearance. Giles had told her not to go out alone until they knew more, but it had been two days and he still hadn't called her. Maybe it had turned out to be nothing more than a random vampire attack... who left Spike alive to pass on a message to the Slayer - to her.

The thought of it was taing over her mind, it felt like her brain would explode if it didn't stop. Buffy needed to get out, just for one night. How much harm could one night cause?

Drew was meeting her at the Bronze for eight. If she only stayed for a couple hours, she wouldn't make it home too late. Spike would no doubt be waiting up for her. She had tried to slip out of the house without him knowing, but he had been in the kitchen with Dawn and Joyce when she had left. He never let on that he was jealous and upset, at least not verbally, but the look in his eyes told Buffy all she needed to know.

Dawn, however, had voiced her concern, leaving out the slayer hungry vampire in their mother's presence.

Sure, Buffy knew she was taing a big risk by going out, but she justified it by being the only way to keep her sanity.

As she approached the small club, Drew came into sight. He was standing at the entrance, casually glancing around.

She smiled as she stopped in front of him. "Looking for me?"

He shrugged. "Maybe."

"Oh, so you've got another girlfriend? Hm, I'd like to meet her - kill her also comes to mind," she said with a small smile to ensure the fact she was joking. In Sunnydale, you couldn't chance those things.

Drew carefully wrapped an arm around her waist as they entered the Bronze. "I've got you Buffy Summers, no other girl could ever compare. So, no need for anyone to die, seems to be enough of that in this town. More so lately."

Instantly, Buffy was interested. "What do you mean more so lately?"

"You didn't hear? It's been all over the papers."

"Readings not really my forte, explain please."

He seemed a little confused at her interest, but said nothing about it. "Well, there's been four deaths in the past week, strange, huh? It gets even stranger. All the bodies have been entirely drained of blood, but there was no blood around the body. Almost makes you believe in vampires," he said, laughing.

Buffy didn't. "Is that it? No symbols or notes...?" When she realized the look he was giving her, she added, "School assignment..."

He nodded. "Yeah, actually. If I'm remembering right, there was a note that mentioned something about a present for the Slayer... whatever that means."

Buffy glanced over at him, her expression grim. "I, um, I have to go. I'm sorry Drew, I really wanted tonight to work, but I, uh, need to go work on that assignment while it's fresh in my mind... thanks for the info."

His permanent smile had suddenly faded. "Look, if it's something I said, or did, please tell me Buffy."

"No, it's nothing you did. You're perfect. It's just... complicated. I'll call you later, I promise."

He nodded. "Okay. I guess I don't have much of a choice."

"I really am sorry," She said before disappearing out the exit.

* * *

She knew this wasn't going to go well, but Buffy could only hope that the news she had would help to aleviate some of his anger.

After knocking several times, the door opened and Buffy stood in front of Giles. Her watcher was silent before backing up a few steps, "Buffy, please, come in."

"Sorry for busting in on your off-duty hours, but this is important Giles," she said, closing the door behind herself.

"Yes?"

She sighed. "I was... out with Drew," she paused, waiting for a response or look, but none came. "You aren't... mad?"

"Quite, actually. However, Dawn informed me of your plans an hour ago, and I've had some time to recover. Still, I believe it was a stupid choice on your behalf, you put not only yourself, but Drew, in extreme danger Buffy," he said, sitting down on a chair.

Buffy decided to pace the room. "I know. I'm a stupid girl who should be punished. But, right now, I have to tell you something."

Giles nodded slightly. "I'm listening."

"Well, while I was out with Drew, he mentioned four deaths - all vampire related. One of them had a note Giles, something about a present for the Slayer. That's our guy, right? I mean, it has to be. He's killing people - a lot of people. He's telling me something, isn't he?" she asked, worry written all over her face.

Giles sighed. "It would appear so. Buffy, why don't you have a seat?"

She eyed him suspciously. "I don't want to sit. I can tell there's something you've been holding back. You know something Giles, please.. tell me."

He nodded. "The vampire you're well aware of goes by the name of Alric. He was turned eighty-nine years ago, and in his time, he... he has killed four Slayers - four talented Slayers. He has no interest in the average one, I suppose they aren't much of a challenge for him. So, he waits. Waits until he finds one that is."

Buffy could feel her head spinning, she felt like she might faint. She knew this vampire, Alric, had it in for her, but she had no idea that she wasn't his first Slayer. Eighty-nine years of experience, how could she possibly match that? She'd been a Slayer for a month, how much of a challenege would she be for him? Maybe if he knew how little she knew about slaying, he would back off? Yet, she highy doubted that. Challenge or not - he had chosen her.

"Giles, this... this can't be happening. I'm going to die. I don't want to die," she said, looking at him her eyes brimming with tears. "I knew this was bad. I was scared. Now I'm completely terrified. I'm only seventeen Giles, I..."

Giles stood, then gently pulled her into a warm hug. "I will do everything in my power to see to it you stay alive and well," he whispered as he held her close, allowing her to be a scared, seventeen year old girl - not the Slayer.

* * *

Even after letting all of her fears surface at Giles', Buffy still didn't feel much better. She didn't know if she was glad that he had told her everything, or upset. It was nice to have truth, to know just what she faced. Yet, it was also terrifying and nervewracking.

The streets of Sunnydale after dark had never been safe. Since becoming the Slayer she'd realized why. If only normal vampires were what haunted her, she'd find them and slay them. Alric was far from a normal vampire - she never wanted to find him, she knew she couldn't slay him.

When she opened the door to her house, she found Spike, sitting on the stairs. He looked up at her as she walked inside.

"Did you sit there and wait for me all this time?" she asked as he stood, wincing at the pain of moving.

"Yeah, pretty much. I was bloody well worried."

"Because of Drew, or my new stalker? Whose name is Alric, by the way," she asked with a tint of sarcasm.

He frowned. "Drew is a bloody pain, but the only thing I'm worried about Buffy, is your safety."

She nodded. "I know that Spike, it's just been a rough night. All I want to do right now is sleep."

"Alright pet, we can talk in the mornin' if you like," he said, expecting to part ways. She surprised him when she reached out and grabbed his wrist. He turned and caught her gaze - hurt, scared, and confused. He had never seen a look like that in Buffy's eyes.

"Think you could return a favour? I could really use a pair of arms to fall asleep in, and yours sound very... pleasant," she said, finishing with a small smile.

He nodded. "'Course luv, sounds like bliss to me."


	19. Chapter 18

Two weeks later, Buffy had come to a lot of conclusions - with a lot of help. Late night talks with Spike had brought her peace in many ways. She had realized she couldn't change what already was, she couldn't not be the Slayer; she couldn't go back in time and prevent Alric from being turned; she couldn't sit around moping, waiting to be killed. She could, however, train her butt off and become great at what she was born to do - slay.

Thanks to Spike, she had found herself - and love.

As she sat in her last class of the day, she went over a mental check list of thing she really needed to improve on in training that day. Giles had kept his word, he'd been teaching her a lot, pushing her to her best. It hadn't been easy, Buffy could only pray it was enough.

"Hey," a voice came from in front of her as the bell rang. She looked up to find Angel looking down at her.

"Angel, what do you want?" she asked as she gathered up her books.

"I know we aren't... close anymore," he started.

"I've been meaning to thank you for that," she snapped. "Catching my boyfriend in bed with my bestfriend was, oddly enough, one of the best things that could've ever happened to me."

As she walked away, he followed.

"I apologized a million times Buffy, I never meant for it to go that far. Losing you was not something I wanted."

"Well, it's what you got. Is that all? Cause I really don't have time for this Angel," she said as they came to her locker.

"Don't do that," Angel said, hurt. "You must still care about me Buffy, after all we've been through."

"I did, yeah, but I moved on. I don't see how you're having such trouble, you did it before we were even over."

Angel didn't say anything as she stuffed her books in her locker.

"It's Spike, isn't it? I knew he liked you, I could tell by the way he looked at you. I'll kill him," he said with a low growl.

Buffy slammed her locker door shut and turned to face him. "God, Angel, when will you get it? Spike or not, you are the last guy I would be with. Just leave me alone, for your sake," she said, storming off towards the library.

After a hard training session with Giles, Buffy had called it a night and was walking home. Giles had put up a little fuss about it, but in the end, she had won. She needed the time to herself, time to think.

A noise behind her caused alerted her senses - vampire. Although she was itching for a fight, she couldn't underestimate anymore. This could just be a regular, run of the mill vamp, or it could be an eighty-nine year old Slayer enthusiastic vamp. If only they wore name tags.

She turned to the distraction, keeping her guard up.

"Why, hello Slayer, so nice to finally see you," came a deep voice from the shadows.

"Yeah, wish I could say the same." No, she really didn't. Her instincts were screaming at her to run, but her mind knew there was no point - he would catch her.

When Alric stepped out towards her, she took a few steps back. He was tall, with blondish hair and a nicely built body - Buffy sized him up as Brad Pitt's evil vampire twin.

"My, my, you're looking quite delicious," he taunted.

"Not what I was aiming for, but I'll take it," she said, sarcastically. "What do you want?"

"I think you know what I want... Buffy," he said, with an evil grin. "I've been watching you."

She stayed calm, despite the fear inside of herself, and eyed him defiantly. "Then maybe you caught a glimpse of how I plan on dusting your ass."

He laughed. "Not yet, my dear Slayer. It's not your time. I must say, it is quite enjoyable watching you squirm. How is that boy of yours doing? Please, give him my regards," he teased.

Buffy's tone turned dark. "Whenever you're ready, I promise, I will kill you."

"That's what they all say," he said, then turned and disappeared.

Once Buffy was sure Alric was gone, she let out a soft cry before running the rest of the way home.

* * *

Buffy swatted at her alarm as it loudly interrupted her sleep. She could hear it crash against the wall, and then - silence. Just as she rolled back over, intending to ignore her wake up call, the door opened and Dawn walked in. Buffy groaned as she felt her sister's weight on the bed beside her.

"Buff, we need to talk," Dawn said, and the tone of her voice caused Buffy to roll back over and open her eyes.

"What's up Dawnie?"

"This vampire that's after you, Alric, I think I saw him last night."

Buffy suddenly felt wide awake. She quickly sat up and ran her fingers through her hair. "What were you doing out at night? You know it isn't safe. Alric isn't any ordinary vampire Dawn, he could've killed you."

"True, but he didn't. It's been nearly a month since he first showed up, I needed to get out Buffy, I couldn't stay in anymore or I would've gone looney tunes. He never said anything, he never even came near me," she explained.

"How do you know it was him then?"

Dawn shrugged. "I could just tell. I'm no Slayer, but I can pick out most vampires The way he moved, the look in his eyes... it was him Buffy, I know it."

Buffy sighed. She hadn't planned on telling anyone about her encounter with Alric two nights ago, but it seemed unavoidable now. Giles would need to know. She couldn't risk witholding anything now - not when Dawn was involved.

"I saw him too, the other night. He came up to me when I was walking home. I think he was trying to get into my head - make me panic." And it worked.

Dawn's expression reflected how Buffy felt on the inside - scared to death. But she tried her best not to let her younger sister know. She was the Slayer - she had to be strong.

"This is bad, isn't it? I thought maybe after all this time, he'd left," Dawn said.

Buffy leaned over and hugged her. "I don't think he's going anywhere until he gets what he wants - me."

"But, he won't right? I mean, you aren't going to actually fight him, are you?" she asked, and Buffy could tell she feared the answer.

"I have to fight him Dawnie, I'm the Slayer. If I don't at least try, a lot of people will die, and I can't let that happen. Right now I need you to listen to me, until I kill this guy, I want you straight home after school and no leaving the house after sunset, understand? I need to know that you're safe."

Dawn nodded. "I understand, I promise I'll stay safe, as long as you promise me you will too."

Buffy sighed. "I wish it was that easy Dawn, but I'm not going to make a promise you know I can't keep. Knowing that you're safe will help me focus on killing this bastard. That's about as close as I can get."

Dawn smiled. "I'll take it. I love you Buffy."

"Love you too Dawnie, you better go get ready for school."

Dawn nodded before leaving. When Buffy was sure her sister was gone, she fell back on the bed and allowed the tears she had been holding back to run freely from her eyes.

* * *

"No. No way. Nuh uh," Buffy argued as Spike looked up at her from his bed in the basement. Giles had called and asked Buffy to take a trip to the Sunnydale Morgue to investigate the bodies for any more clues. Although she would enjoy his company in a place like that, it was far too dangerous. Spike had already been hurt once by Alric, and he barely survived. There was no way that she would compromise his safety again, just for the sake of his company.

"Oh come on, I'm feeling much better - promise," he protested. Yeah, he still walked with a limp and his ankle was a bit swollen. But he could almost see clearly out of his left eye and his shoulder only hurt when he moved it. He was in top shape as far as he was concerned.

She shook her head. "I said no. It's too dangerous Spike, I don't know what I'm going to run into and I can't risk you getting hurt again. I'm the Slayer, not you - I can handle this."

He laughed. "Alright, let me put it this way luv. Either I come with you, or I take a long stroll 'round Sunnydale with my vulnerable self - a delicious happy meal with legs for all your fanged friends."

Buffy rolled her eyes as she paced the basement. "You cannot be serious. You'd nearly kill yourself just to win an argument?"

He nodded with a sly smile. "Come on Slayer, don't you want some live company amongst all the dead ones?"

Buffy sighed. Could it really hurt? It had been a few weeks since Spike's accident, maybe he was feeling better. If she left him behind he could end up dead, at least if he was with her she would know he was safe.

She could tell by the determined look in his eyes that he wasn't bluffing, and he had no plans on giving in. "You better not pull any macho crap if this turns ugly, understand me?"

Spike smirked before standing up and planting a quick kiss on her cheek. "I'll make sure you don't regret it."

"Uh huh, I'm sure you will," she said, heading for the door. "Grab the cross on the chest. Just incase."

* * *

As hard as it was to believe, the morgue was not on Buffy's 'top ten places to visit' list. She was the Slayer - she dusted vampires and saw dead bodies on a fairly regular basis, but this place was different. There were people in here who she couldn't save, people who just... died. It had an eerie feel, and she wanted to make this as quick as possible.

But she had to admit, it was a little less creepy with Spike by her side.

"What 'xactly are we lookin' for?" Spike asked as he looked around the deserted building.

"Anything suspicious... which would be pretty much anything in here."

He nodded, following her into a new room. "Wanna split up pet?"

"So you can run into a nice and hungry vamp all by yourself? I think I'll pass. We should stay together at all times, understand?"

"'Course, you are the boss."

"It's about time you realized," she said.

Twenty minutes and a dozen dead bodies later, Buffy decided to call it a night. If they were going to find anything, they would've found it by then.

"So, that's it then?" Spike asked as he watched Buffy take one last look around.

She nodded. "Yeah, there's nothing here... Or maybe there is," she said as the familiar tingle ran down her spine.

Spike's head tilted. "Vampire?"

She nodded as she pushed him into a room. "Hide. Now."

He laughed. "I don't hide luv."

Buffy sent him a glare that told him otherwise, and he reluctantly listened and went to find a safe place, pulling the large cross out of his jacket.

Buffy left the room Spike was in and quietly made her way down the hall to the source of her tingly feeling. As she turned a corner, she saw them - three vampires headed right towards her.

"Slayer," one growled.

"That's me. Not too many of your average humans enjoy the company of the dead... Well, actually, neither do I... But you get my point," she said, pulling a stake out from her pocket.

"We come with a message," another said, stepping towards her.

"Let me guess, Alric? What's he got to tell me now?"

"If you want your friends to live, meet him at the Fairfield Cemetery tomorrow night after sunset."

A threat against her friends, that wasn't exactly a surprise coming from the vampire who had beaten Spike to a pulp only weeks before. Buffy knew how serious Alric was, she didn't doubt for a fact that he wouldn't follow through with it. Alric would die, but first...

"Well, thanks for the message," she said, then lunged at the closet vampire. She quickly staked him, and moved onto the nest, dusting him just as easy. "I hope Mr. Stalker Pants is a better fighter than those two or it won't be much fun. You're lucky, I have a message of my own for your boss. Tell him I'll be there, and I have no plans on losing."

She watched as the vampire ran off, leaving her by herself. She hurried back to he room where she had left Spike.

"It's safe," she called, and he emerged from behind a curtain wearing a displeased expression.

"Safe, eh? You sure 'bout that Slayer? Wouldn't want to get a scratch," he said sarcastically. When she didn't reply with a smart ass comment, his expression turned to concern. "You alright Buffy?"

She nodded. "Yeah... I think."

"Doesn't sound like it to me. The vamps, they were sent here, weren't they?" She nodded again. "What'd they want?"

"Take a guess," she said, her tone flat, empty.

Spike closed the space left between them and pulled her into his arms. "I'm sorry pet. We'll get this guy," he whispered.

She shook her head against his chest. "No. There is no "we". I have to do this on my own. I'm the Slayer - this is my responsibility. I can't have any of you getting hurt. _Especially_ you."

"I won't let you do this alone Buffy."

She looked up into his eyes, her own watery. "You don't have a choice."

And he didn't. She would sooner chain him to a tub then bring him into this fight - her fight.


	20. Chapter 19

Buffy walked down the street towards the cemetery – towards her potential demise. This fight could be her last. Whether it was her destiny to live or die, she had no plans of going down easily.

It was a wet night, dark and damp. It was the kind of night that could potentially damper a person's mood. But Buffy didn't need to worry about that, her mood couldn't be any more damper than it already was.

Saying goodbye to Spike had been heartbreaking. The thought of never looking into his eyes, kissing his lips, or lying in his arms killed her.

As she stepped into the cemetery, a sharp pain shot down her spine – it was her instinct screaming at her to turn and run.

"Why, if it isn't my little Slayer," she heard Alric say from behind.

She spun around to face him, her stake sliding out of her sleeve to her fist. "Your Slayer? Come on, I know you're like a century old or something, but change with the times."

He smiled - she hated his smile. "Feisty, I like that in a Slayer... makes their blood tastier."

"Too bad you'll never taste it again then, huh? I came here for one reason – to kill you... uh, again," she said as she raised her stake.

"I can tell I am really going to enjoy this fight Slayer," he hissed.

She smirked. "Not as much as I am – guaranteed."

"Enough trash talk, let's get on with it shall we?"

"Took the words right out of my mouth," she said, lunging at him.

He gracefully dodged her attack and sent her stumbling. She quickly recovered her balance and punched him – he punched her back. She raised her leg to kick him, but he blocked her and countered with a combination of his own which sent her to the ground. Before she could move, Alric pinned her to the ground, using his strength and body weight to keep her still.

"You put up a good little fight Slayer – best I've had in a while, but in the end you're no different from the Slayers that came before you – alone."

She brought her head up and connected with his, loosening his grip enough for her to force him off and jump to her feet. "You really didn't think that was all I had, did you? And you're wrong, I'm not alone. My friends might not be here physically, but they're always in here," she said, touching her heart. "Now can we get on with it? I still want to get home in time to study for this major algebra test tomorrow, you know, once I stake you and all."

Alric opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Buffy followed his gaze to just about his heart where an arrow was poking through. Buffy leaned slightly to look behind him, and she saw Xander holding a crossbow a few feet away.

"Wow, I guess I was wrong too, looks like my friends are here," she said, catching his attention. "So where-..." she was cut off when yet another arrow came whizzing towards them, only this time Alric turned, caught it inches away from his chest, and snapped it in half.

Alric glanced to Xander, then back to Buffy. "This is between me and you Slayer. Control your friend or I'll gladly do it for you."

Buffy motioned to her friend for him to back off, and then readied herself for another attack. When Alric lunged at her, she blocked him and countered with her own mix – left, right, kick, duck, turn. Just like she had done earlier to the practice dummy, she intended to destroy him.

As he pushed her back, she caught a glimpse of metal coming at her. She reached out and felt the hilt of a sword fall into her hand, and out of the corner of her eye, she saw him – Giles.

"You're not playing fair Slayer."

She smirked. "I'm sorry; I didn't know fair play was in the 'How to Kill a Vampire Handbook'." She swung the sword around herself, trying to intimidate him with her "skills", even though she'd only ever used a sword twice before in training. But she was the Slayer, wielding weapons was part of her calling.

Her attempt at showing off her natural ability with a sword didn't seem to strike fear into Alric's heart. Just before she moved to strike, he fell to his knees in a scream of pain. He seemed to be on fire or at least close enough to.

Buffy had no intentions on missing the opportunity; she kicked him, connecting with his skull. He never fell or faltered, but he never moved to get up as he continued to howl in pain.

"I'm disappointed, I expected more from a vampire with your power. I hate to say I told you so... no, wait, actually I don't," she said, and then finished the fight by using the sword in a swift motion to decapitate him.

As his ashes scattered, Xander, Giles and Spike approached her.

"Not that I'm not majorly happy you guys showed up, but that was dangerous, he could've killed you," she scolded.

"Well we weren't just going to sit home and bake cookies while you're out here alone fighting some super vamp... good aim or not, you couldn't keep me away Buff," Xander said and she smiled.

Buffy nodded towards the crossbow he held. "You're lucky you're cute Xand, cause your aim really does suck."

"I blame my parents and their lousy genes," he said and she hugged him.

"Thank you," she whispered into his ear, "My hero."

When she pulled away, she turned to Giles and after sharing a smile she walked into his embrace. "Well done Buffy, I'm proud of you."

"Thank you Giles... you broke every rule in the Watcher's Guide, huh?"

He nodded with a laugh. "You're more than just my Slayer Buffy; there are no rules when it comes to you."

She smiled, her eyes watery, and then turned to Spike who stood waiting patiently. "And you, don't even get me started," she said harshly, before her expression softened, "Holy water balloons... nice touch."


	21. Chapter 20

It was over. There would be no more worrying, no more looking over her shoulder as she walked at night. Well, no more than usual. Evil still existed, and she was still the Slayer. She loved her power – she embraced it now. The thought of facing more powerful vampires and demons still lingered in her head, but she had promised herself she would cross that bridge when she came to it. She lived in the present. She was present Buffy – new and improved.

There was only one dark cloud that loomed over her – Drew. He had no idea who she was. He thought he had found a nice, slightly weird, but normal girl. If only he really knew. She had considered telling him, for a brief second anyway. Maybe he would be okay with it... but she knew better. She couldn't drag him into a dark and dangerous would – he just didn't belong there.

Buffy had come to a conclusion; she had to break up with him. Was she a bad person for the fact that it didn't bother her? But why would it? She was in love with Spike.

Spike.

It hurt her hiding how she really felt. She wished more than anything that they could be together in the real world. In a way though, she thought it might ruin things between them. Their entire relationship, from the first kiss, had been a huge secret. What if they didn't know how to have a "real" relationship? Wait – of course they would. It was Spike. It was her and Spike. If anything was real, it was them.

And then there was what scared her the most – Dawn. What would she think? Would she be angry, upset, or understanding? Would she ever speak to Buffy again?

"Hey there," Buffy looked up from her spot on the bench outside of school to find Drew.

"Hi... how are you?" she asked awkwardly.

"You mean since the last time we spoke, two weeks ago? I'm great."

Oh no, had it been _that_ long? She couldn't help it, she had been a little preoccupied with staying alive.

"Listen, I am really sorry about that. I just... don't think I'm ready for a commitment of any kind. I'm a busy girl, in ways you don't even want to know. You are an amazing guy Drew; you deserve someone who can give you all the things that you offer."

"And I'm guessing that someone isn't you," he said softly.

"I really wish it was, but no... It's not. You don't know me as well as you think, and that's a good thing... for you."

"Right. The "it's not you, it's me" speech," he said. "I've never gotten that one before."

Buffy sighed. "But it's true. You're perfect, and you deserve perfect... I'm not."

"Says who? Look, I'm not gonna go all stalker boy on you. I really do like you, even if I don't understand you. But if this is how you feel, then thank you for being honest Buffy," he said, sitting down beside her.

"See, perfect. I'm gonna miss you Drew," she said, looking over at him.

"You aren't dead Buff, I'll see you around," he said with his signature smile.

She returned it. "Definitely not of the dead."

_Thank God._

* * *

Uh oh. Angel was headed straight for her. She looked around the hallway for a chance to dodge him – there was none. She dreaded their conversation before he even approached her.

"Buffy, hey," he said, stopping in front of her.

She sighed. "I think you know where this conversation is going... and that's nowhere," she said.

"Don't be like that Buff, don't pull away," he said and she rolled her eyes.

"Angel, I don't know how to make myself any clearer – I'm done with you and all the drama that you bring. I'm happy and-..."

"He botherin' you pet?" Spike interrupted as he appeared beside Buffy.

Angel's glare turned dark as he focused in on Spike. "This doesn't concern you Spike, back off."

Spike subconsciously wrapped his arm around Buffy's waist. "Actually Peaches, it does."

"I knew it! I knew you and _him_ were sneaking around. What the hell are you thinking Buffy?"

"She's thinking you better disappear before you get hurt mate," Spike growled.

"I'm not scared of you Spike," Angel spit back and Spike smirked.

"Wasn't talking 'bout me."

"He's not serious..."

"Oh he is. You don't know me anymore Angel; I don't think you ever did. Just leave," she said, her tone harsh.

Angel looked from Spike to Buffy then sighed. "This isn't over," he said before turning and walking away.

Once he was gone, Buffy felt eyes on her and glanced around the hallway to find everyone staring at her and Spike. Her gaze turned down to his arm wrapped securely around her waist. She hadn't even noticed he had done it, it had felt so natural that she'd forgotten where they were and what it meant.

"Um, Spike," she said, and he followed her stare. He moved to pull away, but she held his arm in place. "No, it's okay - no more hiding. Alric helped me realize that life is short... I could die any day, any second. I don't want to waste any more time... I love you."

He nodded with a smile. "And I love you Slayer. Alright then, you hungry?" She sent him a look that told him the answer and he laughed. "Right, when aren't you hungry?"

As they started to walk, she reached over and intertwined her fingers with his. The eyes that watched them didn't bother Buffy, she barely saw them. All that mattered to her at that moment was that she was alive and with the man that she loved.

* * *

After a long kiss goodnight down in the basement with Spike, Buffy was headed up to her room when she heard Dawn behind her.

"Buffy, I think we need to talk."

Buffy cringed as she turned around to face her younger sister. "Dawn, I..."

"Don't. Why didn't you tell me?"

Buffy sighed. "This is exactly why I tried to fight the way I felt. I never wanted to hurt you Dawn. I'll... I'll end t with Spike, I..."

Dawn raised a hand to stop her. "I'm hurt, but not because you're with him. I'm hurt because you didn't tell me. I had to find out from people at school asking me a million questions."

"You don't know how many times I wanted to tell you, but I couldn't. What could I say? 'By the way sis, mind if I love your ex?'"

"Did you say... love?" Dawn asked and Buffy nodded. Dawn continued with a soft smile, "I have never heard you say you loved someone, not even Angel. Me and Spike, it was great. I care about him a lot. But Buffy, if you and him have the chance to be someone amazing, I'd never forgive myself for being the reason you didn't. I love you, you're my sister, and I think you and Spike are just a... a perfect fit."

Buffy didn't know what to say. Not even two seconds ago, she thought Dawn was about to rip into her and now... now she was happy?

"I, um, what exactly are you saying here?"

Dawn shrugged. "I don't really know Buffy, this is all so confusing. Is it weird? A little. Do I hate you? Of course not. I understand you've changed; you aren't the old Buffy anymore. I know that you'd never hurt me intentionally. I know if you could change the way you feel, you would. But you can't help who you fall in love with. Yeah, it's gonna take some time to get used to, but honestly, don't worry about me. I don't love him anymore, its been weeks since I truly have and I can see the way he looks at you... how I never noticed before is beyond me. He loves you Buffy, like loves you loves you. And as your sister, I strongly advise you to love him back. You know what they say, a couple that slays together stays together," she finished with a smile.

Buffy could feel the tears falling freely from her eyes. Dawn's approval meant more to her than anything. "Thank you Dawnie," she said, pulling her sister into a hug. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I'm sorry you had to find out that way."

Dawn nodded. "I think I can manage to forgive you since you do kind of save the world and all that."

"Are you sure about this?"

"I'm sure. Absolutely, without a doubt, sure. You can't fight fate, right?"

Buffy smiled. "No, you can't."

"You better get some sleep, rest up for the big history test you have tomorrow."

Buffy's face blanked. "Test? What test? Nobody told me about a test."

Dawn laughed. "That's because you don't have one – now, we're even."

"You almost gave me a heart attack! But, I deserved it. Goodnight Dawnie."

"Night Buff, sleep tight, don't let the bed vamps bite."

* * *

"It's awful dead out here tonight," Buffy said to Spike as they walked through the cemetery hand in hand. "No pun intended."

"Guess you're show with Alric gave 'em a proper fright."

"Somehow I doubt that, but I'm not gonna go all complainy girl." He smirked, and she eyed him. "What?"

"Just thinkin' of how bad I wanna kiss you right now," he said seductively.

"Oh really? And when were you gonna do that?"

"If I tell you luv, it'll ruin the surprise."

She laughed. "Okay, well I was thinking of something too."

"And what's that?" he asked.

She stopped walking and turned towards him, pushing him into a nearby tree. She pinned him there with her body as she looked into his eyes. "Surprise," she whispered against his lips before kissing him. His arms encircled her waist and pulled her into him as the kiss intensified. She brought her arms up and wrapped them around his neck, bringing his lips even closer to hers. She was hungry for his kiss, his touch – and she could feel him return it.

"Is this a... bad time?"

A voice behind them separated their bodies and Spike let out a disappointed moan. Buffy turned to see Willow, Xander and Dawn standing there awkwardly.

She could feel her cheeks redden. "Uh hey guys, we were just patrolling," she said as Spike wrapped an arm around her waist.

"Pretty hard to see any vampires what with all the face sucking going on," Xander said, making her redden even more.

"You're just jealous because no one wants to suck face with you," Dawn defended.

"Say, who wants to go to the Bronze? I hear it's the hottest club in town," Willow interrupted.

Buffy laughed. "Cause it's the only club," she shrugged, "Might as well, I don't see any psycho Slayer stalker vamps around."

Xander let out an exaggerated sigh. "Oh great, way to jinx us Buff."

Spike smirked. "Course you would believe in that pansy bull."

"Give Xand a break, he's been on the wrong end of a lot of demon issues," Dawn said in his defense.

"Yeah, like the end of their fist," Spike quirped.

Xander stepped towards him. "You're one to talk Bleach Boy."

Spike rolled his eyes. "Oh now that's original."

"If you two can't control your testosterone I'm going to turn this car around," Willow said, playing stern.

"Uh Will, hate to break it to you, but we're walking," Buffy said and she shrugged.

"I know, I just always wanted to say that."

Dawn laughed as the group began to walk through the cemetery towards the Bronze. "We might be a tad... dysfunctional, but God, I love us."

Buffy nodded. "I hear dysfunctional is totally the new normal these days."

Xander stopped walking and looked ahead. "Oh hey, vampire," he said casually.

Spike immediately perked up. He had been feeling a lot better since his accident, nearly back to his full strength. He was itching for a good slay. "I call dibs," he said.

Buffy raised an eyebrow. "Dibs? I'm the Slayer, I always get dibs."

He smirked at her. "Or not, I called it."

She smiled. "Fine, but you have to beat me to him."

"You're on Slayer."

"Well this should be interesting," Dawn said as the three watched the couple race off.

Xander wrapped an arm around each of them as they started their walk behind their two fight-destined friends. "This is how I like it – me and two of my three favourite girls," he said and they both laughed.

"That's because we're the only..." Willow started, but stopped when she noticed something up ahead. "Are they fighting over a stake?"

Dawn smiled. "Like I said, highly dysfunctional, but how can you not love this?"

"You know what they say," Xander said. "A family that slays together..."

"Stays together," the three finished together.

THE END

Thank you to everyone who read my story, and for all the nice reviews. I hope you enjoyed it, and there might possibly be another fic from me soon. Thanks!


End file.
